Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Thursday January 1, 2015 - Leelah Alcorn

Leelah Alcorn was a teenage transgendered girl who committed suicide, because of family rejection. This a sad sorry to start 2015. However, it is what is motivating me to come out. We have to educate others that the future is bright. If we can make it, we must show others that there is hope and they can make it.

This reminds me of my cousin in the early 1970's came out and was rejected by her family. She died of AIDS in 1986 after having lived in the streets and becoming a transgendered prostitute to survive. She would have been 62 years old.

I believe just being out in the community can show a young person, who you will probably never meet, know that we exists and can live a long life.

Please, do what you feel comfortable doing to help our sisters. If we do not, who will?

Wednesday December 31, 2014 - Finally Told One

My wife and I have three beautiful daughter. They are in their 20's. As a matter of fact, my oldest turned 30 on Halloween. We use to joke during the pregnancy that it was looking more and more like a Halloween baby. Sure enough, contractions started at 3am on Halloween. We both looked at each other and said darn.

Sure enough even with it being the first baby and labor expecting to take many hours, a 21 hour-labor period was unlikely. So our first born is a Halloween baby.

She is now married with two children (6 and 4) and working on her Masters degree is Sociology.

She and I left the Family Christmas party to find a store to get some items. While out, I decided to tell her about my transgenderism. I plan on tell all three of my daughter, one at a time, when the time feels right.

It felt right to tell my oldest first because she is the oldest and her degrees are in the area of Sociology. I figured, knowing her father was a T in the LGBTQ alphabet soup might help her in her field..

Plus, it would help me get the courage to tell others. I told my first cousin years ago and my brother earlier this year.

Well, I told and she said she knew since she was 13 in 1997. I did not ask her how she found out. But I gave her my history and interactions with physiologists when I was a teen. I told her, there is no cure because its not an illness. Its just who I am.

I felt my transgenderism made me a better father for my daughters because I can understand certain things, especially as a pre-teen, learning makeup and clothes and the desire to shop.

I remember one time when the girls were getting ready to go on stage during their dance recital. I was in the back with the other moms applying makeup to my daughters. The other moms stated how amassed they were at how well I applied the makeup. I told them my standard story:  That my mother had a line of makeup and I learned from watching her staff applying markup during tests.

Telling my daughter went well. We talked about it and I answered some of her personal and clinical questions. Since she knew, she had no problems with it. I except my other daughters will feel the same way.

My issue with telling people is not concerns about rejection but exposing the truth about myself and dissolving those mental chains.

I am going get rid of those chains in 2015. That is my New Years resolution.

Be save this New Years Eve.

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Tuesday December 30, 2014 - Remove the chains

I remember crossdressing at 8 years old. We moved into a new house and I was trying on my mother's clothes. I do not remember trying on her clothes while living in the apartment. I can not remember what made me want to try them on.

I wore her girdles with nylon stocking and heels. At 8 years old, her shoes were too big and I use to stuff the shoes with paper. Nylons  came folded in a box. I loved sliding them on. I watched my mother, to learn how to gather each nylon stocking at the toes, put my feet in and then roll them up my legs. I use to watch the original Star Trek and Wild Wild West while dressed. I felt so at peace and comfortable.

I found out later that my mother thought my younger sister was wearing her clothes.

As I reached double digits in age, I began to outgrow my mother's clothes. So I started taking older clothes from my mother and younger ( by 1 year) sister and remaking them. I use to watch baseball games on TV and adjust the older clothes.

Then my stash was discovered. I had my shoes, bras, girdles and nylons. I use to wear them to bed. My dad talked to me about it first, saying that sometimes its a phase boys go thru. But then at 14, I was sent to a Psychiatrist who tried to make me hate wearing women's clothes. All he did was tighten the chains in my closet.

I did not try on women's clothes for the rest of High School and College. However, it did come back in Graduate School.

During the 1980's, 1990's and 2000's, I peaked my head out of the closet but could not remove those chains.

In the 1990's, I told my parents that the therapy did not work. My mother accepted it while my father ignored it. I can not remember the exact year, but one day my mother and I went shopping and out to lunch as mother and daughter. It was one of the best days of my life.

Fifty years later I am finally getting out. I realized that those chains were all in my head. It reminded me of the elephant story:

As a man was passing the elephants, he suddenly stopped, confused by the fact that these huge creatures were being held by only a small rope tied to their front leg. No chains, no cages. It was obvious that the elephants could, at anytime, break away from their bonds but for some reason, they did not.

He saw a trainer nearby and asked why these animals just stood there and made no attempt to get away. “Well,” trainer said, “when they are very young and much smaller we use the same size rope to tie them and, at that age, it’s enough to hold them. As they grow up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot break away. They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free.”
My generation of transgender people are still being held in the closet by mental chains. But you can break those chains and come into a more accepting community. You can educate others and explore a fantastic life that awaits you.

It's not easy at first. I am still being tugged by those chains. But everytime I go out, the chains weaken.

I can tell, it will not be long before I go from Femboy

to Women

Or somewhere in between

Monday, December 29, 2014

Monday December 29, 2014 - Solved Mascara Problem

In a previous post about 2 weeks ago, I talked about my problems with mascara. I now wear black mascara everyday. I wear glasses and I do not put on much (1 coat). Its more of developing that daily routine.

I curl my lashes and then put on the mascara. Once I put on the mascara, my lashes straighten out. I tried something earlier this week. I curled my lashes a second time, after I put on my mascara and let it dry.

It worked. I knew the mascara was weighing down my lashes. So I decided to let them dry and then curl them again. I thought about this because I was in the drug store looking at some lash curlers and noticed some of the packages had additional rubber strips for the bottom part of the curler. I thought, maybe the strps need to be replaced because they get mascara on them. If that is true, them women are curling their lashes, after they apply mascara.

I have not tried it in femboy mode yet. In femboy mode, I wanted to add more layers of mascara but it caused my top lashes to straighten out even more. So next time, I will add more mascara and curl my lashes afterward. I did test it and it looked great.

I laughed afterward because it took, me all this time of trying to figure out what was wrong, when most women learn it as pre-teens.

Sunday, December 28, 2014

Sunday December 28, 2014 - Beauty Shop - Femboy day - I bought a new wig

After I left Payless on Friday, I was headed to Burlington Coat Factory to search for a pea coat. Just as I left the Payless Store a train began crossing the street I was going to use. It appeared like it would be a long wait, So I decided to stop at the Beauty Shop next door.

I like going to beauty shops in both male and femboy mode because they sell so much stuff for women. Some of the stuff is cheap, and probably does not last long. But since I do not wear it often, it works for me.

I like to browse the jewelry and nail polish..

So, I went inside and looked at rings. There were not many people in the store. I found two nice rings at $1.50 each.

While I was looking, a guy came in looking at perfume/cologne. He was looking for a gender neutral  type.
The guy working behind the counter stated that the bottles with the white tops were good for either men or women.

I walked up to pay for my two rings and a young lady met me and the counter and asked where I found those rings because she like them and thought they were cute, I showed her where I found them.

Once back at the counter, I was told there was a $5.00 min. on debit cards. So I decided to look at earrings. I found a nice silver heart shaped pair that will match a silver heart shaped pendant in my jewelry box.

While I was looking for a pair of earrings, the other clerk came to the front counter. She was talking to the other clerk about how she had to work both Christmas Eve and on her birthday, December 23.

I went back up to the counter to add my earrings to my rings. The female clerk made eye contact and smiled. I smiled back and said hello.

The male clerk stated that he liked my white shelled bracelet.  The lady clerk was also at the counter and stated she liked my big silver bracelet on my right hand. They both laughed and said how nice both bracelets were and that I had an eye for jewelry.

I said thank you and felt very comfortable around them. I thought about what the female clerk said earlier about her schedule and how nice she seemed. It was at that moment, I decided I was going to buy a new wig from her.

I asked when they closed and they said 8:00 pm. So I left to go to Burlington Coat Factory.

After I bought my pea coat, I came back to the Beauty Store. Both clerks said hello when I walked in and asked if I forget something. I said hello and joked that I could not stay away. We laughed and I walked to the rear wig section.

I have wanted a new wig for years. My current wig was bought over 20 years ago. It was very expensive and still wears well. But the color is wrong (too dark) and the style is old.

I want a lighter color because I am getting older and the lighter color brightens my look. The older wig has a full bang across the face and I want a swoop bang. Finally, the old wig is shoulder length and I want to look at different lengths.

I asked the female clerk, if she could help me find a wig. I had a few pictures.

I told her, I was not sure of the color or length but I want a swoop bang. She called it a feathered look. So we tried on at least five wigs to get the right look. Once the right wig style was chosen, I tried on three different colors.

My stylist gave her opinion and asked the other clerk for his opinion. Also a few ladies came in and gave their opinion. I felt so comfortable with my stylist and I took the various comments in stride. It was great. I did not feel like a guy looking for a wig or embarrassed in anyway.

Here is my choice.

I like the lighter color and the length is just below the shoulder. The bang will allow me to show one eyebrow, which I find sexy.

The above picture does not do the wig justice. I will get a better picture next time.

This wig was less that $40 which will work for now. But I will want this style in a better quality wig. So I asked the stylist where I can get a handmade wig with real hair and a silicon cap. She gave me the name and number of a guy who makes those types of wigs by hand.

Finally, I gave my stylist a $20.00 tip for her help and for having to work on her birthday, next week. She hugged me and was very appreciative. She asked how did I know she was working on her birthday.

I explained that I heard her while I was looking for my earrings earlier and that she was so nice, I want to help make her day like she did for me.

I left with my wig and headed to Ultra Beauty

What a great Thursday/Friday femboy day.
  1. Pedicure
  2. New shoes
  3. New pea coat
  4. New wig
  5. Finding a makeup consultant

Each event was special which is why I wrote a separate post for each one. I do not expect each femboy day to be this good. But my confidence is sky high. I can not wait for my next femboy day.

Saturday, December 27, 2014

Saturday December 27, 2014 - Makeup at Ultra Beauty on femboy day

I stated in an earlier post, that I now wear black mascara every day. I wrote a post about this. I am having a problem with it. I curl my lashes in the morning before I put on my mascara. Once I apply my mascara, my eyelashes slightly straighten out. So I decided to go to Ultra Beauty and ask the clerk for help.

By the time I got to Ultra, it was dark and getting late. I parked close to the entrance and under a light. I then locked the car and walked in. It was crowded. As I walked around, both clerks were at the register and I realized, I might not get any one-on-one help.

I was looking along the foundation aisle and I notice a young lady with fantastic makeup. It was flawless. Well my day had been unbelievable so far and this was the last stop of the day. So I made the first move. I asked her if she used Fashion Fair makeup.

She said no. She uses Revlon for every day and a  brand called Cinema Secrets for evening. I told her that her makeup was flawless. She smiled and said thank you and we talked about Fashion Fair makeup For her skin tone, Fashion Fair it had too much red.

We talked about, how in the past Fashion Fair was just about it for African-American women, but now the other cosmetic firms have included all skin tone in their product line.

I stated how I used Fashion Fair from the mid 80's but my supply is too old to use now and I need to find the best cosmetic line for me.

We talked about makeup in general and ended up talking about transgenderism and how I knew since about 8 years old. So I told her about my life and then she talked about her career as a makeup artist.(her website).

Jackpot, a makeup artist!

We talked about her business and how she is trying to enter the Georgia T.V. and Film Industry. Guess what, I have connections into that industry. So I got her email address and sent her some of my contacts. I had to use my boy contacts, because I will call my friends and tell them to expect her call. Also she needs to use my boy name as a reference.

She also told me that when I get a free makeover, make sure I tell them if its for everyday wear, evening wear or drag wear. Because some of the clerks will assume drag wear.

She does not know it yet, but I am going to hire her for an hour or two for some one-on-one makeup lessons.

After saying goodbye and heading out of the door, I said to myself, what a way to cap off a great day.

But it occurred to me, as I meet people and exchange email addresses and phone numbers, should I use my boy contacts or girl contracts. I do not have a femboy set of contacts. What name should I use? Today, I used both, depending on the subject.

I do not have a phone number for Susan King. So, I am going to use Google Voice and set one up.

It's an interesting question that I will answer by my next femboy day, boy or girl contacts when exchanging information with new people I meet in femboy mode.

This is the forth post about my Thursday-Friday femboy day. I saved the best for the next post.

Friday, December 26, 2014

Friday December 26, 2014 - Pedicure during last Friday's femboy day.

While out last Friday, one of the things I wanted to do was to get a pedicure. I heard they felt nice and were soothing. So around 11 am, I went to the Foxy nail salon.

First let me say, I keep my feet in good condition. As part of my daily routine, I put Vaseline on my feet every morning, once I get out of the shower. Also along with my finger nails, I paint my toe nails and keep them clipped and neat. I like to keep my feet nice and soft.

I took my flats off and rolled up my jeggings, which was hard to do because they are so tight. I placed my feet in the tub as I sat in the chair. The tech did not speak English, so we did not talk. She seemed new because she kept asking the other tech who spoke some English, questions as she worked.

There were only two other ladies in the shop. One was getting her eyebrows shaped and her friend was on the phone. During my pedicure a lady with an older sister came in and asked the third tech to clipper her older and more feeble sister's finger nails.The older sister had been in the hospital for a while and her nails had grown too long.

The younger sister sat in the coach near the TV, which was across from me. Our eyes met and I said hello. She returned the salutation. I asked how her sister was doing and she said she was weak but getting better. She brought her to the nail salon to get her nails trimmed and painted in hopes of improving her mood.

I assumed that because I work on my feet, they did not need much work. But I was wrong, the nail tech did a lot of work cutting and filing along with working on my cuticles. I decided on french tip nail polish.

Two young ladies came in and got pedicures. They sat next to me. They talked to each other and did not appear to notice me.

Once she finished, I paid and put my feet under the dryer. I liker her work, but I would have liked a narrower white tip.

My feet felt good and it was a good way to start the day. I wish I could have worn open toe shoes to show off my pedicure. But that is stretching the femboy look too much right now.

This is the third of  five or six  posts about my femboy day last Friday. Its been almost a week and I mis going out as a femboy and meeting people.

Thursday, December 25, 2014

Thursday December 25, 2014 - Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah & Happy Kwanzaa

During joyous time everyone should take a few minutes to be thankful for what they have. Some of us have more than others, but this is not a time to compare. Its a time to look at the positive and the glass as half full, not half empty.

I am happy for my wife, children, grandchildren, siblings, friends, co workers, health and current era of openness.

Of course, I miss my Grandparents, Parents, In-laws and friends whom no longer here, but I laugh at the good times and memories. During this time, I make sure I tell stories about them. This way those who did not know them can get a sense of who they were and why they meant so much to me.

For you older folks like me, you remember the old 16MM film. It always trips the young people out to see the choppy movie with no sound and me at 2+ years old. My daughters get to see their grandparents when they were in their 20+ which is the current age of my daughters. Of course they only remember them at 60+ years old.

For me its about the Christmas day dinner. I remember in the late 50's and early 60's sitting at the childrens' table. Then as a teanager and young adult sitting at the adult table with my Grandparents at opposite ends of the table. Then married with children, sitting at my Parents or In-Laws table with them at the head. Now its my wife and my turn to sit at opposite heads of the table. The same table my In-Laws had.

Its at that time I realize how short our time on this planet is. It goes quick.

So get out of the closet or do what you want to do within reason and go for it. The world of 2014 is vastly different from 1964, 1974, 1984, 1994, 2004.

I think by 2024, if we work at it, transgenderism will be "mainstream".

There will be no need for blogs like this except as a history lesson about an unenlightened and bygone era.

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Wednesday December 24, 2014 - femboy day - Pea Coat

I have been looking for women's pea coat for weeks. Ever since I saw and tried on two leather ones at Goodwill. The two I tried on at Goodwill that day, were too small. But since then, I have visited over 10 other Goodwill stores in metro Atlanta, and could not find another pea coat I like.

So, Thursday night, I decided to go to a few department stores to find a coat. I went to Kohls first. I did not know a wool pea coat cost so much. The ones I liked were listed at $150+. They were on sale at 50% off, buy even at $75+, they were over my budget.

I saw one I liked, but at $90 (sales price), it was over my budget.

I liked this coat because of its color and style. I wanted a double breasted coat that flared at the hips and the hemline stopped just below the belt. I tried it on and the large size fit perfectly. The arms length was long enough and I loved it. But hated the price, so I moved on.

In another section of the store, I found a nice coat.

It was a creme color coat with a diagonal zipper. It was a fur trimmed hoodie, which I like as a casual jacket. If the weather gets bad, the hoodie will cover my head.  The sleeves were long enough with an elastic wrist band. The price was right at $24 and it matched my current outfit.

So I bought it. But I still wanted a wool pea coat.

So, I went to Belks. I saw another black wool pea coat I liked. It was on sale for $70. It fit perfectly, but was over my budget. I thought hard about it. But I decided that since I was going to be out all day Friday, I will check other stores for one I like at a lower price. If I do not find one, then I will come back and get this one, if its still here.

My main goal Friday was to find that pea coat. I went to Ross and TJ Maxx, but could not find one I liked. So I went to Burlington Coat Factory. If I could not find one there, then it was back to Belks. I even tried the same Goodwill store where I saw the original two black leather coats. No luck.

Burlington was crowded. I found the women's coat section and took my time looking for "that" coat. While browsing, when I made eye contact with another women, I smiled and looked her in the eyes. All the woman I made eye contact with smiled back and some said high as we passed. I returned the hi in a soft voice. No one jumped at my voice and I am sure they know I am not a women.

As I was zeroing in on a few coats, the lady next to me complained that even with the large number of racks she could not find what she was looking for. I said the same thing, as I had been through 6 racks with no success. She complimented me on my new Kohls jacket I bought last night. She liked how I matched it with a grey and white turtleneck. I thanked her and told her I bought it a Kohls yesterday.

Then I found it. A white and black pea coat in my size at $50. I tried it on and it looked great.

This pea coat was double breasted wool with a belt. The sleeves were long enough and it cut in at the waist and flared at the hips. The belt added to the hourglass look.

Once I took my coat off and put on this new one, the lady next to me stated that to jacket looked great on me. I went to the mirror to check for myself and I agreed with her. All my hunting paid off. She stated that she hopes she finds one that fit and looked as nice on her as mine did. I smiled.

As you can see, its not 100% black but the color and design will go with my black, grey and blue jean leggings. I can not wait to wear it. I walked out of the story happy that I bought this coat and my interaction with my "neighbor" at the coat rack.

This came after my experience with at Payless. I was just "floored" at how people were treating me. The most I hope for is that people ignore me. But they are actually interacting with me.

A good think about going out as a femboy is that I do not care if I pass. Its about infusing femininity and feeling comfortable. Learning how to interact with women in public is my priority. I want to be able to go anywhere (as long as I feel safe) without a second thought. Just like I do in boy mode. Of course safety is a higher priority and I am aware of that all the time. There are things I do in boy mode that I would not do in femboy mode. For example, where I park as it gets dark and making sure I have my car keys in  my hand when I leave the store.

This is the second of  five or six posts about my Thursday-Friday femboy day. After buying this coat in a crowded store....oh one more thing.

I had to wait in line to pay and three young teenage girls were in front of me. Twenty years ago, I would not have waited  in that line. I would have browsed around the store until those girls had checked out. Because back then pre-internet days, pre-teen and teenage girls were the toughest to deal with. They naturally watched women and seemed to have radar when it came to identifying crossdressers. In the 1990's, I was called out on two separate occasions by groups of teenage girls, as a guy in a dress or a crossdresser. I knew of others who had the same experience with groups of young girls.

But this time, nothing was said, no whispers, no looking back and no stares. I thought about it and realized, the internet brings transgender people to them all the time. Now these young people probably have transgender friends online and/or maybe in person. Or at least they see them online or on youtube. So its not a shock and its not unique.  I did not know other crossdressers (older term) were out there until the early 80's and The Phil Donahue Show.

After buying this coat in a crowded store, I knew I could tackle the world.

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Tuesday December 23, 2014 - Friday Femboy - Shoes

My Thursday night femboy activity included shoe shopping. I like going to Payless Shoes and Shoe Show because they have my size (12) and the prices are reasonable. At this point, since I do not wear them often, I do not want to put too much money into shoes. I just want something feminine and cute.

I had a 15% off any shoe coupon at Payless, so off to Payless. I arrived around 6 pm and went straight to the size 12 section. In femboy mode, I try shoes on. I tried on a group of nice heels, just to check how they look and feel.

I tried on the three below.

I liked how this one looked. I would have it as a casual wedge when in female mode. But since I am not there yet, I would not wear this shoe anytime soon, so I left it.

I need a new black pump. The one have have is nice but old. I bought it decades ago. They were expensive shoes and since I have not worn them often, they are still nice and are still very comfortable. That old shoe taught me that expensive shoes are worth it in the long run.

But these new ones have the a round toe that makes a size 12 foot look smaller. Again, I would not wear them often enough, so I took a pass on them. I did like how the round toe looks on me.

I wanted a boot this fall/winter. But the one I wanted, I could not find in my size. I tried on this ankle boot. I have a boot problem. My ankles and calves are small. There is too much room between my leg/ankle and the boot. I like a snug look. This ankle boot was OK, but I still had that "floating ankle" look. My ankles looked like sticks.

The sales lady came by and stated that she liked the shoe below and what did I think. I told her I liked the color but the heel was too high because I am tall (5'10").

She asked what I was looking for and I told her I needed a brown flat and I might buy a few more that are on sale. She pointed to a shoe (see below), I was eyeing. So I tried them on and decided to buy them.

I saw this Oxford (see below) which was on sale and decided to buy it because I can wear that in both boy and femboy mode.  Also, I like the color. At $10, my 15% coupon makes the price $8.50. I do not like the laces, so I will switch them out later.

Then, I saw a flat that interested me last week, but today it was not in my size. So I asked the clerk if any other stores had that shoe in my size. She printed out a list of stores that had the shoe and included a $4.00  coupon. I need that coupon because once I bought the two shoes above, I will have used my 15% off coupon.

During my busy Saturday femboy day, I went to one of the Payless stores on the list that showed the show I wanted.

It is a black shoe with a gold zipper and gold area under the zipper. I like flats with buckles and ornate fronts. I found this one at the store in my size. I noticed that for the first time in a long while, there was a male sales clerk. 
I brought my shoe to the counter and showed my coupon. The shoe box had a $19 price on it, but my coupon said the shoe was $16 with an additional $4 off. The clerk said the coupon was correct and my price was $12.00.

Then a wonderful thing happened. He looked at my left hand bracelet and said he liked it. It reminded him of Africa, where he was from. He asked me where I got it. I told him, I found it at a beauty supply store and I liked it because of the sea shells which remind me of the ocean. I love the ocean. He followed up by saying it matched my outfit.

I bought five bracelets like the one he liked, but in different colors. After he rung me up, he went to help another customer and the other sales clerk appeared while I was packing up. 

I could not believe it but she was wearing my sweater dress, I blogged about last month. I told her, I have that exact dress and love it. She said it was one of her favorite sweater dresses. I mentioned that I like to wear it as a dress with skinny jeans or as a sweater. She was wearing it as a long sweater with a creme jacket and black tights with calve high boots.. 

We talked about its flexibility, feel and look. We both agreed its a great wardrobe piece.

Once in the car, I thought about that interaction with both clerks and how easy and comfortable it was. Then I thought about my conversation with the other Payless clerk Thursday night and our discussion about those colorful heels. At both store, I was treated like a person and my look did not appear to affect them.

I love talking fashion with the ladies. Add the compliments and I am so happy.

This is the first of  five posts about my Thursday-Friday femboy day. Each post gets better. You have to see my last post in this series about my wig purchase.  

Monday, December 22, 2014

Monday December 22, 2014 - Pinterest - Pink Outfit

I was playing around with today. I put together a pink outfit.

It's fun creating a board and I like this pink outfit. Its cold and wintery today and this board brings spring a little closer. The pink, grey and pearl colors work for me, its cute. I tried to add all three colors to my accessories to encircle the pink and grey dress.

The open toe shoes screams spring time and femininity. I think the pearls add elegance and class. What do you think? Any suggestion for upgrading this look?

Check back, I am going to put together a Femboy board.

Follow Susan's board Pink Outfit on Pinterest.

Sunday, December 21, 2014

Sunday December 21, 2014 - Spent Thursday and all day Friday as a femboy

I spent Thursday night and all day Friday as a femboy and had the best two days ever. Basically, I spent the whole day and a half shopping and looking for clothes.

I found more than clothes, shoes and jewelry. I found friends and consultants. It was unbelievable how people treated me. Even some guys (both store employees) treated me with respect and they complimented me.

After striking up a conversation, I was asked about my dress and I said I am trangendered and then gave them my history. It was fun and liberating, educating people and letting them know that we are real people.

I was more natural than ever before, saying hello, Merry Christmas and just talking to ladies in the stores about girl stuff.

Sometimes I get a little nervous when getting out of the car, but soon I was out and about talking in a manly but soft voice. I was called both Sir and Ma'am at times and it did not bother me, because I am presenting both, as a femboy.

Over the next week, I will break both days down by events, stores and items bought. I will include photos. Wait 'til you see my wig!

Here is a basic summary:

Stores - Items bought
Payless Shoes - three pair of shoes (two locations)
Goodwill - Pea Coat - could not find one
Burlington Coat Factory - Pea Coat
Belk - Looked around but did not buy
Kohl - Creme Coat
Quicktrip - Gas and Food
Hair Beauty Store - Jewelry and new wig (must see)
CVS Drug Store - Knee Hi's and some travel items for my purse
Foxy Nails - Pedicure - French tip color
Ultra Beauty - Makeup Advise form customer

Compliments - Payless, Hair Beauty Store and Ultra Beauty
Long Talk - Payless, Hair Beauty Store and Ultra

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Saturday December 20, 2014 - Voice

Thursday and Friday were femboy days. I had a lot of driving around to do and a big To Do List.

It's interesting how people treat me as a femboy. Most do not use gender greetings. Of those that do, most say sir and a few ma'am.

It does not bother me one bit, what they say. I am polite and courteous to everyone. I look other women in the eyes and say hello with a smile. Usually, I get a smile back and/or a hello.

When I get doors open for me, I smile and say thank you. I try to say thank you in a soft voice.

In 2015, I am going to work hard on my voice as its decidedly male. I have been watching some youtube videos on a more feminine voice. But I am going to find a coach because I need that feedback.

I do not know if I am going to find a local coach or a coach using Skype.

Below are a few videos I like.

Friday, December 19, 2014

Friday December 19, 2014 - Makeup in Boy Mode

When I started wearing mascara everyday, I was wearing a clear color because I wanted to introduce makeup into my daily routine, but did not want it to show.

I went to the Ulta Store as a femboy and the store clerk helped me find some black mascara. Once I tried it on, I was hooked. So the last week, I switched my daily mascara from clear to black. No one said anything. Whether in boy or femboy mode, nothing.

Well, my 20+ year old daughter was with me today and she said that she did not realize how long my lashes were. My wife stated, that was where she (my daughter) got her long lashes from.

The conversation moved on to something else.  But I said to myself, WOW, my daughter noticed my "longer" lashes but did not mention the mascara or why they appear longer.

I will definitely keep the black mascara at all times.

This is similar to what happened when I started manicuring my finger nails and painting them clear, even in boy mode. No issues except the one guy who asked how I kept my finger nails looking so nice and clean.

So in both cases, mascara and finger nails, they are noticeable but no one says anything negative, even in boy mode.

Now, I only add lip gloss, brow pencil and eye shadow when in femboy mode. Once my electrology is complete in 2015, I will add a light foundation cover.

I might try adding more makeup when in boy mode.

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Thursday December 18, 2014 - New Sweater Dress

While I was driving around as a femboy, last Saturday, I did some shopping, not much because my  To Do List. was too long. Also, one of my clients had an issue, so I had to stop for a long lunch and use the restaurant's WIFI to get online and help my client with their emergency.

What's great about today's virtual world is that I can work anywhere. All I need is my technology (phone, tablet or laptop) and a WIFI connection.

Anyway, I found a pretty sweater dress. I need to add some type of wrap for my shoulder and arms during the winter months. The color is Christmas-y but the lack of sleeves means I need a coat when outside and a wrap when inside.

I love how it hugs my body and it feels soft and feminine. I am wearing tights and heals for that feminine look. But as a femboy, I am going to add  jeans, flats and a coat.

Below is the dress as part of my femboy look. I added a hoodie and black jeans with flats. I folded the sweater dress up and under to bring the hemline to my waist and the hem of the hoodie.

I kept the top of the waist design showing. I think this looks cute and makes it look like a sweeter with a design along the hemline.

 I love playing with clothes and changing the look. All of this is helping me learn stuff, I should have learned as a young girl and teenager.

Better late than never.

Monday, December 15, 2014

Monday December 15, 2014 - Nails

I have been working hard on my finger nails. I let them grow out and keep them polished with a clear coat. The other day, I had a guy ask me if I get my nails manicured. I told him no, that I do them myself. I went on the explain my weekly regime. It was fun having two guys talk about hand and nail grooming.

My nails split and have ridges. To stop the splitting, I wear gloves when doing dishes and constantly lotion my hand with Vitamin E, baby oil at night and my coconut/castor oil mix I created. This keeps my hands and nail soft. Also my curticles stay smooth. I notice that if I do not drink enough water, my cuticles begin to peel.

At least once a week I spend 60 to 90 minutes working on my nails while watching TV.

  1. If they are polished, I remove the polish to let them breath
  2. If they are not polished, I polish them with clear polish
  3. Without polish on, I buff my nails to remove any ridges
  4. I like an oval shaped nail, so I contour my nail edges
  5. I try to keep my nail length past the edge of my fingers
I am right handed and have trouble keeping my nails from breaking, once they get past my fingers, the right nails start to break first, then the left nails. So last night with five of my ten nails broken, I cut the other five to start over again.

As you can see, I tried to cut them evenly, so they can grow back together. I hate when they break and I have to start over, They look so good when the length is longer. My hands are big (Darn) but keeping them neat, clean, polished and healthy attract positive compliments.

Women know how much time it takes, that is why many go to the salon, But for me, this is a very feminine activity that I like to do.

Lately, I just added a new polish under my clear coat. Its called Fiberglass Network by Salon Science and I bought it from Sally Beauty Supply.

It is suppose to harden you nails but keep them flexible enough to not break off as easy. I tried it, but I am still learning how to put it on without distorting the look of my nails after I put on the clear coat. The above picture of my nails have the Fiberglass polish under the clear polish. They look good.

But on my right hand, I can not add the polish as consistently (left hand not as coordinated) so I do not get the same smooth look on my right hand. I am working on it, but I will take time. I love doing this and learning to get better.

Now I know why young girls spend hours on makeup and feminine activities as they develop their style.

Now as a femboy, I can do the same thing. Its fun learning and adding feminine activities to my daily life.

Saturday, December 13, 2014

Saturday December 13, 2014 - Femboy Day.....Yeah

Today, I am going shopping. The last few weeks, I was busy at work and trying a new local electrologist.

Now with my face clear, I need to get some new leggings and I am going to hunt for that double breasted pea coat which stops at the waist with a flair bottom. Ever since I saw that one at Goodwill, I have been hunting for a larger one.

Sometimes, I wish I bought that smaller one because it was only small because of that sweater, I was wearing. I probably could have worn that one during warmer days when a sweater would have been too hot but a nice jacket would work.

Oh well, I have checked over 10 other Goodwill stores in Metro Atlanta, and can not find one. So I am going to spend some money and buy a new one.

Today I am wearing my new black flats, black jeans, purple turtle neck and jacket. The jacket has purple flowers with black trees and a white base. I think it works. I topped it off with my black and white hat.

 Also, I am going to Ultra to ask about my eyelash problems in which my mascara takes out my lash curl.

Friday, December 12, 2014

Friday December 12, 2014 - Mascara Problems

I stated in an earlier post that I was wearing clear mascara as a way to learn how to put on mascara and to start a daily makeup regime.

I am lucky that I have naturally long eyelashes. I apply a mixture of coconut oil and castor oil every night. This nightly regime has slowed my eyelashes from falling out.

Well I have upgraded my mascara and now wear black instead of clear. First I curl my eyelashes daily. But I have problems with my left eyelashes. For some reason they are hard to remain curled. They are so unruly, it drives me crazy. But the new black mascara makes these left lashes even worse. Once I put on the mascara, it causes my left eyelashes to lose all of their curl.

I can not figure out if I am putting on too much mascara or if I can find a lighter weight mascara that still gives me the coverage and color I like without straightening out my lashes.

I am going to go to an Ultra store and ask for help.

Below is the mascara I currently use that was recommended by a consultant at Ultra.

Any recommendations?


Saturday, December 6, 2014

Saturday December 6, 2014 - Could not mix clothing

Friday, was suppose to a femboy day. But I could not because I started with a local electrologist. So I needed to let my whiskers grow. Therefore my face was too masculine to be a femboy.
I wanted to wear these grey leopard leggings I bought at Goodwill.
Well next week.