Friday, September 30, 2016

Friday September 30, 2016 - New Pew Poll has an interesting result.

A new Pew poll asked 4,500 US citizens three questions in an attempt to find out where America stands on Religious Freedom vs LGBT non-discrimination. There are some very interesting results.

One of the issues polled was transgender people and public bathroom use.

Should transgender people be allowed to use the public restrooms of gender with which they currently identify (I will call this answer ID.)or required to use public restrooms of gender they were born into (I will refer to this answer as Born )?

Over results: 
+5% A majority of americans support our use of public bathrooms, based on our presentation (ID). This is very good

ID     51%
Born   46%

There are some interesting results when you breakdown the results

A) When broken down by Transgender type: Public opinion does not differ between the two basic sets of transpeople.


B) When broken down by Men vs Women: Woman are our biggest supports.


C) When broken down by Age: The future looks bright for our community. We have positive support from those under 30 years old and negative support from those over 50 years old.


D) When a person knows a Transgender person: If someone knows a Transperson, they support us by a large margin.

Knows a Transgender Person
Doesn't know a Transgender Person

This poll has very good poll results for us. It shows that the more we come out to people we know, the better for our community as a whole. This includes positive images in the media and social networking. If you are deciding whether to come out, remember, it will not only help you but will help everyone.

Thursday, September 29, 2016

Thursday September 29, 2016 - Gender neutral toy commercial.

Growing up in the 1960's, I remember hiding to play with my sister's dolls and playing with makeup and jewelry when no one was home.

This short toy commercial from Smyths Toys in the U.K. shows that toy companies are slowing becoming gender neutral. Over time, these commercials will help mainstream non-gender conforming people. This is good and represents one of the tiny steps forward.

Target eliminated gender based grouping of toys in 2015.

Thursday September 29, 2016 - Sunday shopping

I also went clothes shopping on Sunday. I found this new and larger thrift store and decided to try it. I was looking for some nice tops, dresses and of course bras.

The store had a nice variety but I needed more time to shop. By the time I finished grocery shopping and taking the food home, it was 6 pm before I got to the thrift store. The store closed at 8 pm.

Its a large store and I decided to check out the bra section first. But unlike my favorite store, this store puts the bras on hangers but they do not sort by size. So I went thru every bra. I can kind of figure out which bras are close to my size based on the band size and cup size.

I did find a 36A and 36B. The 36B has a bigger cup size than I need, but the bra was so pretty. Its the one with the color print and rhinestone. I only bought the 36B because it was so pretty. My test for buying something, is that if I put it back but keep thinking about it, then I go back and get it.

Next I decided to find some dresses. I noticed my problem is that I am now a size 12. I was an 8/10. I still like that 8/10 dress style which has a flat front. But my little stomach now requires me to look for an empire style instead of a tighter sheath  style dress.

I picked 5 dresses but could only fit into two of them. So my eyes are smaller than my body (LOL). The other three were too small.

I bought this sun dress. I like the hem length and the empire style. I am not sure I feel confident enough to wear a dress with spaghetti straps because of my shoulders. But I like it and I decided to buy it. I am going to wear it before it gets too cold and see how I feel.

I like this white, black and grey dress, but it was too short and too tight. This pictures do not show my protruding stomach. But I like the print. Darn! I put it backt.

I ran out of time as the store closed at 8 pm. I wanted to try on more dresses and find some tops. So I decided I will go back because they have a huge selection.

Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Wednesday September 28, 2016 - Grocery Shopping on Sunday

Sunday, after exercising and then cleaning up around the house. I decided to go grocery shopping. I ended up going to three different stores as I gathered my food  needed for the week.

Overall, it was so empowering to be perceived as a woman. It's because I am a woman. I now have female hormones traveling within me. I know from the mirror, that I am looking more feminine everyday.. The most powerful part is that I no longer consider myself a crossdresser trying to pass. This mental state radiates outward to the people around me.

All day, people used female pronouns without hesitation or a funny look. Words like ma'am, miss, honey, lady and woman were used. I had doors opened by men all day. I had a few slow down as they got to the door and then open it for me in anticipation of my arrival. Something, I use to do just to get a better look. Lol

I received two very nice compliments from other woman. I knew they perceived me as a woman because of the conversation and how they approached me. In both cases, I used a relaxed voice and had a conversation with them.

The first lady stopped me as I was walking into the first grocery store and stated she loved my hair. I could tell she was not sure, if it was a weave, wig or my own hair. She did not ask. She stated she loved the style and look and asked if I did it myself. Before I could answer she said she was looking to add some weave into her hair, so she could get a look like mine. I told her that I had it done. She asked where. I gave her directions and she knew the area and was going to go. The reason I knew she could not tell whether it was my hair because she did not make any assumptions about my hair until I said something. I did not say it was a wig or weave, just that I had it professionally done.

The second lady walked up to the food counter where I was waiting for some takeout chicken tenders and stated she loved my top. I told her thank you. She then looked at the empty food bins behind the counter and stated she was upset they did not have anymore fried chicken wings. I told her that the guy was cooking some and he stated to a previous customer that they would be ready in 3 minutes and she had reserved 3 wings. So I mentioned to the lady next to me to ask the employee working on my order about the wings.

When the employee came back with my chicken tenders, the lady asked her about the wings and the cook said from behind the deep fry that the wings were ready. The employee bagged 4 wings and the customer said thank you to her and me. I walked over and decided to get some chili. The lady walked over to me and stated how she loved the chili. I told her that this is not my favorite grocery store, but I like their chicken tenders and decided to try some chili. After I got my chili, we both walked over to the checkout counter and talked about how this store is nice but they are so busy that they sometimes run out of cooked food. I mentioned that I was buying my food for the week. She was doing the same thing. I felt from her demeaner and our conversation, that it was two woman talking. It felt sooooo good.

At one store, during checkout I had to show my ID. I just whipped out my guy ID and showed it to her. She matched my ID name with my debit card and did not miss a beat checking me out.

I am so grateful, I spent two years going out as a feminine male and learned that not matching my picture was not an issue anymore. My doctor has a free service to help transpeople change their ID. I told him I will let him know when I am ready. But I am OK with the mismatch.

I ended up with some good meals for the week. I made some  spaghetti with meat sauce, bought some chicken thighs on sale that I baked, got those chicken tenders, a bowl of chili and items for my salad.

Overall ,it was a new normal and I loved it.

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Tuesday September 27, 2016 - The gym and my new plan

This is the start of my third week of my new exercise plan. During week 1, I did workout three days, trying to get my body back into the exercise mood. Last week, I do not workout at all. So in order to get close to 12 workout days this month, I need to workout 4 days this week and next week.

I am back to an hour on the elliptical machine and Sunday I added 5 mins on the stairmaster. I am going to slowly increase my stairmaster time back to thirty minutes.

If I can get back to 60 mins on the elliptical and 30 mins on the stairmaster, I will be OK. But the problem is that I am not burning calories at the same rate I use to. Using the machines' calorie counter, I am now burning about 10% less calories per hour. This is probably due to my reduced muscle mass from HRT.

So exercising is good but I need to exercise longer to burn the same amount of pre-HRT calories. I expect this deficit to grow as I lose more muscle mass. I may need to add weight training in an attempt to maintain more muscle mass. But right now, I want to has less muscle and look leaner. Again I maybe able to do this by using lighter weights with more reps.

But exercise is only part of the solution. Caloric intake is the most important part. During my 2010-2011 weight loss, I learned that caloric intake was a more important (about 60-70%) weight loss factor than exercising.

My problem is that after I take my night meds around 8 pm, I get very hungry. I try to just eat a salad, but I end up eating a lot of calories, just before bedtime. I might be needing these calories during sleep to help with my transformation. But I bet I am eating excess calories that are going all over my body as fat.

I need to try and slow this down. So I am going to take my evening meds at bedtime and then go to sleep. I tried it Sunday night and Monday morning, I work up starving. That is OK, because I can eat more in the morning and use it as energy during the day.

I hope the morning staving feeling is my body using up all its caloric storage, at night to help with my feminization. If my body needs more, I hope it will pull fat from my cells. That is why I must drink more water before I go to bed and when I wake up to go to the bathroom. Water is the vehicle the body uses to extract fat from your cells.

Below are two pictures of me at the gym. The picture on the is pre-HRT while the left was taken Sunday.

up to 10 months Pre-HRT

3+ months HRT

Noticed how my breasts are fuller (which I love), but so is my stomach (which I hate). I am going to try and figure out how to shrink my stomach and keep my breasts growing.

Also at what point do I male fail (look too feminine) to go to the gym as a male?

Monday, September 26, 2016

Monday September 26, 2016 - Just being Susan

Sunday I felt like putting on something pretty. In the past I use to plan those days when I would crossdress as Susan or as a feminine boy (femboy). But today, it was different.. I was not crossdressing, its  just dressing how I felt.

I decided to go to the gym in the morning. I will provide more detail about that in Tuesday's post. Once I got back from the gym, I showered and dressed, did my hair and put on makeup.

Just like when in boy mode, I set out to do my chores and run some errands. I did some work around the house and then decided to go grocery shopping for the week.

I just felt normal and so confident. It is hard to put into words. I was just being me. Not only did I go to the grocery store (3 of them), but also the beauty supply store, a new thrift store and a shoe store.

Everywhere I went, I was treated with the appropriate pronoun, men opening the door for me, woman talking to me about random things, and I received many compliments.

As I write this Sunday night, I am still dressed the same way you see in the picture. I cooked the food for the week and watched TV. Now I am going to take my nightly shower and then clean the kitchen.

Over the next three days, I am going to discuss what happened today. But the posts will not be blow-by-blow accounts. But more of how this new normal affected me and my interaction with the community.

Tuesday: My new plan to lose some weight and get back into the gym. This is based on my Sunday morning workout

Wednesday. I ended up going to three different grocery stores. The ladies in these stores treated me as one of them. I received so many compliments and random woman just started talking to me while we were waiting for service.

Thursday. I went shopping for some dresses and tops. I found a few and I have some pictures to share.

I am ready to go 24/7 but my finances and upcoming contracts will not allow me. That is why I wanted to wait until 2017. I am right on schedule.

Sunday, September 25, 2016

Sunday September 25, 2016 - HRT breast growth timeline

I took a picture in my pink bra to show that it was the same style as the new turquoise bra I purchased. I noticed yesterday how my breasts have changes since the last time I took a picture in my pink bra.

The picture on the left was taken on August 16, 2016. The picture on the right was take on September 23, 2016. I could not help but notice that in just 37 days, there was that much growth. I knew it indirectly because I have been having trouble with brushing up against door frames. Also, at night when I roll over onto my stomach, I feel them  and it hurts. Finally as I stated in an earlier post, some of my male shirts could not hid them. Also, the way I hug people had to change because of the pressure it puts my breasts.

At this rate, I maybe in a 36B before the end of the year.

Saturday, September 24, 2016

Saturday September 24, 2016 - How I created my female look

There are five items (tools) I use to create the Susan look. I am going to use the last selfie I took before I started HRT. This look is now changing due to HRT and I will have to change the use of these tools. To me this constant change is part of the fun of being a girl.

Here are the five items I built my look around.
  1. Hair
  2. Eyebrows
  3. Glasses
  4. Foundation
  5. Earrings 

My hair is the biggest item I have to create my feminine look. I love this wig and it took me awhile at the beauty store to find it. After trying on at least 5 other wigs, once the clerk put that one on me, I saw Susan the way I thought she should look. The brown color softens my look, the side part is cute and the big swooping bang that covers one eyebrow and almost one eye is sexy. The wig changes the height of my face by covering my forehead. My hair gives my face a very feminine and sensual look.  

I use a eyebrow pencil to frame and fill-in my eyebrows. Even though only one eyebrow shows, it defines my face with a small arch at the outer part of my eyes. Its an attempt to open up my eye area and provide a more youthful look.

I went to LensCrafters  as a feminine boy for both the eye doctor's appointment and when I came back to buy the glasses. My glasses are from the woman's section. Because of the way I was dressed and the type of color I wanted color in my glass frame, the clerk took me to the woman's section. I wanted large frame glasses that would make my face look smaller in comparison. These were the largest frames they had. I would have liked the bridge to be even with the top of the right and left frame. However the bridge is slightly lower, but it still works.

I use two different foundation colors. I use a lighter color under my eyes to brighten that area and blush at the apple of my cheeks then up and around under my eyes sockets to my temple. I contour (darken) under my blush area and along the top part of my cheeks. It took me a few attempts before I found a foundation color I like and that matches my skin color. This makeup makes my face look feminine and flawless. Part of that is due to years of a daily skincare routine that keeps my face soft and clean.

My earring are not seen in the picture. But I am wearing jewel stud earrings that match my dress color.

I am not wearing a hat and I have not figured out how to choose a hat that fits my style. 

Overall, one of the things I love about being either a part time or full time woman is developing my own style and getting that look that matches my inner feelings.

Friday, September 23, 2016

Friday September 23, 2016 - Jackpot!!! Finally found some nice bras

It' funny. The last few times I went bra shopping, I could not find anything. This time I went boy clothes shopping and found four bras!!! I am so happy. I also bought four male shirts and three male pants.

Now, with seven regular bras and a new male wardrobe, I can present as male without the an issue and not have to wear the sports bras. I just feel more comfortable in regular bras then sports bras. I will still wear sports bras at the gym and as backups. But from today forward, every day will be a regular bra day.

I found three 36A and one very pretty 36B. I bought the 36B because of its color, style and lace. Also, it will help we see if I begin to grow out of the 36A and into the 36B size.

Below are some pictures of my new bras.

I already have this size and style in pink. I found the exact one in turquoise. This is a nice addition.

This is a back black bra. Its a nice neutral color that will go with my tan color bra. It is a 36A and fits well. It has a nice feel to it and will be one of those everyday bras that will hide well under a lot of different tops.

This is pretty lace bra. Its a 36B, so I do not fill out the top lace part yet. But I loved the color and it fits. I definitely have room to grow and the bra will give me indications about when its time to move up to a 36B full-time. That will occur when I fill out the lace along the top of the cups.

I saved the best for last. I found this pretty underwire 36A  push-up bra. I love the color and style. The blue bow is so cute. Best of all is how it helps my cleavage. I did not know it was a push-up bra until I put it on at home. I put my orange top on and wow. It looks great. This will definitely be one of my favorite bras when I wear a low cut top or dress.

No more bra shopping. If I find one or two more, than OK, but I am not going shopping for just bras anymore. I hope I am OK until 2017.

Thursday, September 22, 2016

Thursday September 22, 2016 - A Navy Seal transitions

It's not easy. Below is a recent facebook post by Ms. Beck about a bad experience with TSA on her way to speak at a TSA conference on TSA and the transgender community. It occurred on September 20, 2016. 

Thursday September 22, 2016 - Male Fail

In male mode I basically wear dress shirts or casual shirts everyday. Due to growing up with gynecomastia, I only wear T-shirts when I swim. I do not think I can swim in boy mode anymore. Especially by next summer.

I have noticed lately that my male shirts are beginning to fail me. Once, in August, while out with Karen, she mentioned that from certain angles she could tell my breasts were growing. So I stopped wearing certain shirts.

Now, I notice the number of failing shirts is increasing. Most of my winter dress shirts are sold colors. So with winter coming, I am going to Goodwill to find some new ones. As it gets colder, I may also need some new jackets and sweaters.

I will present female more in 2017 and present full-time later in 2017. But I am afraid my male mode may fail before that time unless I get a wardrobe upgrade.

Its hard to show in pictures, but here are a few picture of one fall and one summer shirt that represent most of my male shirts. I took a front and side picture of each shirt..

The first picture is with a summer shirt. I stopped wearing this shirt in August 2016. This is a recent photo and its shows this shirt failing. The creases point toward my breast line which is pushing my side pocket outward. I figured if there was that much of an indication while standing straight. This shirt would probably show more throughout the day as I move around.

The next shirt is one of my heavier, full sleeve winter shirt. I would probably start wearing this shirt in later October or November. The front view shows the pockets are beginning to be pushed apart. The side view shows creases pointing toward my breast line. By the time I start wearing this shirt, I think I might fail.

This weekend or maybe later today, I am going to buy some newer and slightly larger size shirts with prints. I am going to need to wear these new shirts all winter, so they will need more more in them.

I am worried about my jackets. I maybe alright with my sweaters because most of my sweaters have prints. I will check them out around late November.

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Wednesday September 21, 2016 - I like this outfit


I love this outfiit. It feels so spring time to me. The dress color and print is something I would wear when feeling happy and wanting to match a pretty day with a pretty outfit. The yellow and green on a white dress just yells spring to me. I think its because of the white background. You know how you have one of those first warm days in spring and you are happy to get outside and away from the cool weather.

The dress style has an old 1950's look. It reminds me of those days in the movie Grease. Which is before my time. Not the movie but the era.. It's from a time when woman dressed up more everyday. I could see my youthful Mom wearing this outfit.

Those shoes are great. I would not wear a cheap pair because they would kill my feet. I would have to sleep in the bathtub soaking my feet, all night. But a leather made expensive pair would wear well and fit like a glove.

What I learned from this outfit, is how a pretty tan pocketbook works well by staying understated. This allows the dress and shoes to take center stage. I probably would have used a pocketbook with colors from the dress. But understating the pocketbook works and brings out the dress.

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Tuesday September 20, 2016 - Transgender Healthcare

I feel fortunate to be able to both find a very supportive and experienced doctor along with the ability to afford my healthcare. Many transgender people are still not as fortunate. But thanks to the ACA, more are gaining affordable medical access.

However, the same dark forces that are using the transgender bathroom issue to attack LGBTQ rights, are now going after Transgender Healthcare rights. I just want to make sure you are aware of this and look out for attempts in your community to rollback this access.

After failing to stop marriage equality, the anti-LGBTQ forces found that the transgender bathroom issue can be used as a wedge issue to create a beachhead from which they can attack other LGBTQ rights. However, North Carolina's HB-2 and the soon to be defeated Govenor McCory will put an end to the bathroom issue becoming law. It will probably remain an effective wedge issue in some areas. But both the economic and now political cost will be too high for those who attempt to codify this issue.

But now they are going after transgender healthcare rights. We must be alert to this and assist in anyway we can. This attempt will be difficult in Atlanta and in Georgia because of the large Atlanta LGBTQ community and its growing statewide economic clout. But I will be watching to join any fight against Georgia trying to remove medical access.

However, this will not stop other states, especially Texas from trying to create a beachhead. I predict that in the long run this will ultimately cause Texas to become more democratic (e.i. purple or blue) as it motivates everyday Texans to fight back.

The Texas anti-LGBTQ community is now suing HHS over its new ruling that stops doctors from discriminating against transgender people because of  the doctor's religious beliefs.

I believe the vast majority of transpeople that have medical care access, can find a supportive doctor. However, in cases of an emergency or if you live in an area with very limited choices, this anti-discrimination ruling can be a very valuable patient tool to guarantee care.

I do not believe they will succeed, but we must remain knowledgeable and vigilant against these attacks against not only transgender rights but all American citizen's right.

A New Front in the Religious Right's Fight Against Transgender People

Monday, September 19, 2016

Monday September 19, 2016 - Having a happy day today.

I woke up in a good mood today and feeling very feminine. I spent a few more minutes hugging my Teddy Bear and relaxing.

I got up and I went to the restroom and again misjudged the door frame. My breast brushed up against the frame and it hurt. Darn it, I keep having this problem with doors and door frames. Not often but every once in awhile.

I looked in the mirror and saw a face that looked more feminine today than usual.

My mind was clear this morning. Over the past week it has been cloudy. Sometimes, I can not think in as much detail as I use to. Also certain older songs now bring tears to my eyes as I think about missing those times.

But for today, I feel energized and my mind is clear. I have been very productive today by making many phone calls and talking to many old and new clients in an attempt to catch up on their activities.

I noticed that I have been more recluse lately, not wanting to get out. My friend Karen is out of town for the next two week, so I have had no one to talk to.

I think I am going thru some more mental changes. Unlike physical changes, the mental changes are harder to identify.

The HRT is working, slowly but surely.

Monday September 19, 2016 - I like his look.

I went to the airport yesterday to return a rental car. As I entered the subway station, I saw this guy with a look similar to my Femboy look that I retired this spring.

 I developed a feminine male look in an attempt to gain confidence in wearing female clothes in public. I presented as a male but in obvious female attire. I was not trying to pass. I just wanted to play around with female clothes and go out in public. I had so many positive experiences, that I gained the confidence to continue transitioning and mix male and female clothes.

I saw this guy in a nice outfit that I considered having a feminine style. I wanted to tell him that I liked the look, but the train was crowded

He was wearing black jeggings that had a nlyon panel on each leg. His top was a grey female top with a black circular scarf. He had on red sneakers and a black bomber jacket.

He reminded me of myself with the smooth hairless face and head. I would have wore a hat and flats instead of sneakers. Plus I would add color to the outfit with a more colorful top.

It was so nice to see someone else using a feminine male look and no one cared or paid attention.

Below is a slide show of some of my Femboy looks from 2014 to 2016.

Sunday, September 18, 2016

Sunday September 18, 2016 - It's never too old, just practice.

It does not mater if you are full-time or part-time. It's not about age, its about confidence and practice. Below is a mature transwoman, who shows how after going full-time, her presentation got better over time.

Same outfit 2 years apart

Friday, September 16, 2016

Friday September 16, 2016 - ACC moves its Championship games from North Carolina

The Atlantic Coast Conference announced Wednesday that it would move its neutral site championships out of North Carolina for the 2016-17 season in response to the state's controversial House Bill 2.

The law prevents cities and counties from passing protections based on sexual orientation and gender identity. And public schools must require bathrooms or locker rooms be designated for use only by people based on their biological sex.

The ACC follows the lead of the NCAA, which announced Monday that it would relocate its championships for 2016-17.

The original dates and sites for the neutral site championships affected:

  1. Women’s soccer: Nov. 4, 6; Cary
  2. Football: Dec. 3; Charlotte
  3. Men’s and women’s swimming and diving: Feb. 15-18; Greensboro
  4. Women’s basketball: March 1-5; Greensboro
  5. Men’s and women’s tennis: April 26-30; Cary
  6. Women’s golf: April 21-23, Greensboro
  7. Men’s golf: April 21-23; New London
  8. Baseball: May 23-28; Durham

Finding a football stadium as ACC-friendly as Charlotte might be difficult. The championship game’s been played at Bank of America Stadium for the past six seasons with an average attendance of 69,641. In the previous two seasons (2008-09) the game was held at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa and averaged 49,412 spectators.

“We’ll do what we need to do,” Swofford said. “It’s a challenge, our next challenge.”

Swofford said the ACC would consider the issue again in the spring if nothing changed in North Carolina’s law. Such prohibitions can last for quite some time: The NCAA’s ban on South Carolina hosting neutral-site championships for flying the Confederate flag on Statehouse grounds lasted from 2001 until it came down last summer.

Friday September 16, 2016 - Hairstyles based on a face shape

As transwoman, we must learn to use all of the fashion tools at our disposal to soften and feminize our look.

Below is an infographic discussing and showing examples of hairstyles that work with different face shapes.

Thursday, September 15, 2016

Thursday September 15, 2016 - Jen Richards joins the cast of "Nashville"

Jen Richards, of Her Story fame, will join the show. The transgender actress will portray Allyson Del Lago in a recurring role. She will play the part of “a tough but understanding physical therapist who helps a series regular through one of their most difficult challenges,” a press release from the network reveals.

It’s not clear which series regular will be seeing the physical therapist, though fans will speculate that it will be Juliette Barnes, whose plane disappeared in a cliffhanger that closed Season 4.

Jen Richards is an Emmy-nominated writer, actress and producer. Her casting marks CMT’s first transgender character and the first out transgender actor on the network.

"Nashville" is slated to premiere on CMT (switching from ABC) with a two-hour episode on Thursday, Jan. 5.

A photo posted by Nashville on CMT (@nashvillecmt) on

Thursday September 15, 2016 - My Teddy Bear

I finally bought a cute teddy bear. I washed it in the washing machine, inside a mesh container. I watched a few YouTube videos first to learn the best way to wash my teddy bear. After I washed it, I let it air dry outside in the 90 degree plus heat.

I added a little lavender into the wash to give it a nice smell. The last few nights I have slept with my teddy bear. It feels so soft and smells sooooo nice. I have enjoyed snuggling and sleeping with my bear as it helps me sleep better .

Now I want to give him/her a name. I got to figure that out in the coming days.

Here I am with my teddy bear. I could not get my Teddy Bear to smile.

Maybe I am too much like Elmyira. LOL

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Wednesday September 14, 2016 - Exercising Again

Sunday, I started exercising again. I went to the gym to watch the Atlanta vs Tampa Bay NFL game. I had not been in the gym since July. I just could not motivate myself. I used the excuse that I wanted the HRT to work its magic and see where my fat would end up. I thought if I continued to exercise,  I would not enough fat to store.

But part of the reason I exercise is to stay healthy, feel better and have more energy. So here I am back in the gym. My goal is to get my overall body slimmed down while hoping for an hourglass figure to grow.

I decided to use the elliptical machine for 1 hour. However after 28 minutes my right calf muscle began to tighten and cramp. I was able to finish 45 minutes before I decided to quit because of my calf.

I must continue to drink more water, if I am going to continue to exercise because of  spironolactone. Spironolactone is a diuretic and part of my daily HRT meds.

Also my effort was not as strong, even though I felt strong. The calorie counter on the machine showed I burned 480 calories in 45 minutes. Usually, I am at 525 calories in 45 minutes. My lower calorie burn rate was probably due to my lower muscle-to-fate ratio.

I was glad to get back in the gym and I want to go at least 3 days a week for the next four weeks. My goal is to get back to at least 1 hour of elliptical machine work plus 30 minutes on the stairmaster machine.

This 90 minute workout will help reduce my overall size while I hope to continue to develop a more hourglass figure.



You can see from the two pictures above, I was thinner in 2015, than I am now. I do not know if I can get back to my smaller size. To get there, I will need to exercise more and reduce my daily caloric intake to around 1700 - 1800 calories. I am not sure I want to do that anymore. I do not mind being thicker as long as I have female curves.

Tuesday, I exercised again. This time,  I drank enough water as I did finish my 1 hour elliptical workout without cramping.. So I hope to continue my 1 hour workout for a third day this week (Thursday or Friday).. Then add the stair master next week.

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Tuesday September 13, 2016 - NCAA Boycott North Carolina.

Monday, the NCAA decided to move 7 championship events that were awarded to North Carolina during the 2016-2017 season. These seven include:

  • Men's D1 basketball tournament - Round 1 and 2
  • Woman's soccer College Cup
  • Woman's lacrosse Championship
  • Woman's golf regional
  • 3 lower division tournaments

The economic impact will be major. Yet read what the North Carolina GOP spokeswoman said.

Its unbelievable the economic cost people will incure to discriminate against a small group of people they do not like.

The Town of Cary was hit especially hard by the NCAA’s decision. Harold Weinbrecht, the Cary mayor, released a statement expressing his frustration that HB2 had cost the town the opportunity to host four NCAA championships. “I am extremely disappointed with this news,” he said. “We are no longer viewed as a progressive state but a backwards one which is a disservice to the citizens of North Carolina. We will lose millions of dollars in economic benefit locally.

Read more here:

Monday, September 12, 2016

Monday September 12, 2016 - Hand/Feet Reduction Surgery

I belong to the TsDoItYourselfHormones Yahoo Group.

The other day, wrote an email about "fixing" male hands and feet on transwoman. I thought it had some good imformation based on her experience. So I reposted the email below, with Dani Tempest's OK.

Elle MsPherson is 6'1" with a size 12 feet (She owns it)

As trans women it seems most of us are striving to be the ultimate feminine form. From the stride in our 5" stiletto's to maintaining each and every hair on our heads as if they were our children... we are obsessed with perfection. With that said, let's 'break down' our feet and hands and get to the reality of "man hands" and feet.

I don't care what anyone claims here about losing 1 - 3 shoe sizes due to taking hormones. Those claims are misguided and misinformed. The fact is, your hands and feet DO NOT SHRINK by taking hormones ladies. Bone structure is SET during puberty. Those are the FACTS and they are undisputed. But don't worry! There is good news!!!

What can happen is you may lose WIDTH in your feet and you may lose GIRTH in your finger size. Fingers and feet do get thinner due to losing weight and muscle. Someone compared the same brand shoes as some kind of way to measure "foot loss". Measuring feet with a ruler or Brannock device is the ONLY way to accurately determine shoe size. I owned a shoe company for transwomen for many years and with all manufacturers there are variations even with the same style. This happens more often than not. Also note that manufacturers especially designer styles INTENTIONALLY mark shoe sizes down to stroke the ego of their clientele. This happens with shoe styles as well as clothing sizes. It's brilliant because you will always purchase the smaller size designer over the larger size right? Think about it. ;)

So as far as "man hands" and feet and the femininity let's break this down...

HANDS: With your hands it isn't so much about the size as much as how your move them. Do you remember having to practice that killer, fem walk in heels? Remember all the work you put into that sexy stride? Now it's time to work on the movement of you r hands. Hands have a stride too, you just have to find it with a mirror and lot's of practice. Masculine habits can and will be broken with a little work.

FEET: This is one of my fave subjects because I too have long feet and toes. Most of us in the trans community do! Oh and those of us that don't are usually not being truthful about it. lol I happen to know a couple of adult trans models that are very famous and trust me their feets are not as small as they claim on websites and wikifeet. Their feet are even photoshopped in photos. So when you see that someone claims to wear a women's size 8 or 9? Add two sizes. ;) Here's a little secret... Many quote their 'boy size' shoe.

Anyway, what many within the community don't realize is that women also have long feet and toes. Did you know that the average super model wears a size 11? Or what about all the movie stars and celebs like Paris Hilton, Uma Thurman, Meg Ryan that wear size 11? better yet look at Elle Macferson. She wears a size 12

Here is a list of cute famous chicks, with big feet (in US sizes):

Elle McPerson size 12 (model)
Geena Davis size 12 (actress)
Michelle Obama size 11 (current First Lady/arm icon)
Brigitte Nielsen size 11 (actress)
Famke Janssen size 11 (actress/model)
Gabrielle Reece size 11 (volleyball star/model)
Venus Williams size 11 (tennis star)
Tyra Banks size 11 (Supermodel/talk show host)
Uma Thurman size 11 (actress)
Paris Hilton size 11 (party-going heiress)
Meg Ryan size 11 (actress)

So what's the bottom line? Your hands and feet most likely won't change too much, but that's okay! You can have big, beautiful hands and feet, 'BBH' and 'BBF' that you can be happy with. Walk tall and strut your stuff GF!

Big & Beautiful Famous Feet

Sunday, September 11, 2016

Saturday, September 10, 2016

Saturday September 10, 2016 - 3rd Month Measurements

Below are my current measurements and the change since last month. The picture is followed an explanation and then a table showing the monthly changes since I began HRT.

The above chart shows that last month 6 of 7 measurements went down. Only my hips remained the same.

I think my weight reduction is due to a change in my eating. I now eat a vegetable plate for breakfast. For lunch or dinner, I eat a nice full salad. For the third meal, I will eat a basic meal with meat. Finally, late at night, I will eat some more vegetables. My caloric intake has dropped and I am no long hungry all of the time. During the first two months, my hunger was constant and difficult to control.

I think a lot of this shrinkage is due to muscle reduction. I continue feel the loss of strength and now its showing up in my measurements.

The area from my under breast (bra band) to my shoulders shrunk the most. The difference between my upper breast area and bust size increased from 2 inches to 2.5 inches which makes the breasts stand out more even though my breast line reduced 1 inch. The difference between the area under my breast line (bra band) and my bust line shrunk slightly from 4 inches to 3.75 inches.

My waist at my belly bust did reduce slightly by 0.50" inch. That is better than last month when it increased 1 inch. I am happy that my waist is shrinking again. It went down 2 inches during the first 30 days.

My hip measurement has not changed but the shape of them is much rounder. I must be losing muscle in the area. My hips use to be more concave but they are decidedly rounder.

My thighs reduced slightly by 0.50" while in the previous months there were no changes.

I am ready to get back in the gym. Over the next 30 days, I am going to try and go to the gym 12 times. I am going to start off slow and attempt to reduce my overall size while hopefully maintaining or increasing the differences between the upper and lower breast area versus my bust size. I was afraid to workout because I did not want to lose ant fat that was accumulating on my breasts. But, if I can keep the size difference between my breast line and the upper and lower area, I will be satisfied. This could help my bra hunting by getting my band size 34 inches or lower and thus would allow me to wear a 34B. I found many more 34B bras than 36A at the thrift store.

Also, I hope the measurements of my shoulders and hips will continue to equalize.

45.0 43.0
ABOVE BREAST 37.0 37.0 37.5 36.0
BUST LINE 38.0 39.0 39.5 38.5
BRA BAND 36.0 35.0 35.5 34.75
WAIST@BELLY BUTTON 38.0 36.0 37.0 36.5
HIPS 40.0 40.0 40.0 40.0
THIGHS 37.0 37.0 37.0 36.5
THIGHS VS SHOULDERS -- 5.0 5.0 3.0

I am looking forward to my next measurements after adding a workout schedule.

Friday, September 9, 2016

Friday September 9, 2016 - R.I.P. Lady Chablis

I never met her but I knew her. I started visiting Savannah (3.5 hr drive from Atlanta) in 1981 as a day trip during my weekly stay in my Hilton Head timeshare. Hilton Head is about 30 miles north of Savannah. I bought the new vacation property at 25, after I graduated from Georgia State University with an MBA and started teaching.

I have always had a love-hate relationship with Savannah because its a beautiful city build on the cotton industry during slavery. But I have come to understand the history of it (good and bad) and the wealth that created blocks and blocks of mansions and beautiful streets capes. As an appraiser, I have appraised many properties in Savannah, over the past 30 years.

Savannah has grown into a nice Metro town with a revitalized Downtown that includes a Martha Stewart's restaurant, SCAD and is a major tourist town.I have even though of retiring there.

Lady Chablis was part of that because of the book and movie (trailer), Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil.

In both 1994 and again in 1996., I spent my weekly timeshare as Susan. Both times I visited Club One, which hosted Lady Chablis. I did not get to see her show, but she was well-know before the book and movie which made her a national star.

For me, I was always proud to see her success because she was an African- American transwoman who caved out a successful life.

Below are a video and story about her. She will be missed.

The Lady Chablis, Sassy Eccentric in 'Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil,' Dies at 59

Thursday, September 8, 2016

Thursday September 8, 2016 - Still having bra shopping problems.

Yesterday I went bra hunting again and came away empty, again.

Currently, I wear a 36A. My band measurement is 35, so a 34 is too tight. My issue is I know my chest is growing, so I do not want to invest too much money in 36A size bras.

Therefore, I am going to a few thrift stores to buy my bras. Goodwill just throws their bras in a bin which. I do not like. I like the stores in which the bras are on a hanger. In the store I purchased my first two (and only ones I have purchased so far), not only hangs them up, but sorts them by size. The problem I have at that store is that I could not find size 36A during my last two visits.

Yesterday, I tried a new larger thrift store that had a nice selection of bras hanging up. ( I decided not to use the word rack! LOL) They were not sorted by size, so I had to check each one of them. Some bras did not have the size tag on them. I noticed the more I looked at them, the better I got at judging both band and cup size. But I could not find a 36A.

The only reliable source for 36A bras are new bras in a retail store like Kolhs. But I do not want to invest that much money in bras that I may out grow soon. The last time I wore my pink bra (see picture), it left some impression marks on my chest. I think it maybe getting too small already. So if I spend money on some nice new bras and then I grow out of them in 3 to 6 months, I will be upset.

Last night I had a talk with myself. I have decided, I will begin to look for 36B sizes. There are many more of them in the thrift store. The cup size maybe a little big, but they give me room to grow and may last a year or two. I do not expect to get much bigger than a 36B because of age and sizes of female relatives.

This weekend I will try another bra hunt, this time for 36B.

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Wednesday September 7, 2016 - Waist Training

Many of us girls dream of that hourglass figure. There are many ways to try and get there thru exercise, food we eat (or don't eat) and waist training.

I have never tried waist training but I found this interesting inforgraphic about it. I though some of you (including me) may find it helpful.

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Tuesday September 6, 2016 - Dinner with Karen - Understanding what happened to me on Saturday.

Last night I had dinner with my friend Karen. We had not met and talked in over a week. Since early this year, we usually get together every weekend and go to the movies. But there has not been many movies we were interested in.

Last week, I was busy working on a  project, so we barely talked. I usually like to talk or text a couple of times a week.

Our three hour dinner and talk included my emotionally stressed Saturday. She laughed and said welcome to womanhood.

I now understand what woman were saying about guys who just want physical sex, have their orgasm and then disconnect. Many times over the years I was like that and I understand why guys are that way.

But before Saturday, I could not fully understand the woman's need for intimacy. I now understand why it's important for the "pre-sex" ritual  activities like dinner, movie, hanging out and talking, being sensual with touching, hugging and just being close mentally and physically . It's really not "pre-sex". Its part of sex for the woman. That is what I did not understand.

Woman need sensual stimulation while guys need visual and physical stimulation. A man who understands this difference and can merge the two, can get any woman they want.

I have very few guy friends who get this and date some of the prettiest woman. As a young man I was better than must, but I considered the "pre-sex" ritual a necessary activity to get to the actual act.

But as I said earlier, it is part of the activity of sex. I have former girlfriends tell me how much they enjoyed me opening the car door for them and treating them like a lady while out. All the things my Dad taught me.

Even today, I still give up my seat on a crowded train or bus. I always open doors for woman. I still offer to help a woman if they are struggling with a heavy or bulky item.

In a way, I wish every young man could have went thru the feels I had Saturday. I they definitely would understand the woman's side of sexuality.