But today I wanted to discuss some of these changes.
- My dysphoria is gone. Its hard to explain. I no longer have that driving desire to wear woman's clothes. Woman's clothes are part of my normal wardrobe and I include them in my wardrobe. I wear what I want to wear. It's about how I feel that morning. I feel like a woman all the time. How I want to express that is up to me that day.
- I cry more. Not breaking down but I feel the emotion when, listening to certain songs, thinking about things or just a feeling hits me. I use to feel that emotion and could hold it in. Not anymore.
- Since high school, I only listened to talk radio. Either news, politics or sports. I never really listened to music unless it was dance music. Now, I only listen to music. I have not listened to talk radio in a couple of months. Since Karen and I went to a Christmas show, I have been listening to some Gospel music. But now I listen to and understand the meaning of the words and the power of the voices. I get it. It's not just a good beat but its the words. I now listen to music at night and fall asleep with it on.
- I am in a happier place. I find myself with more pep in my step. When I am out, I just feel better and want to interact with people even more than usual. .
- I use to be a very aggressive driver. Learning to drive New Jersey meant that I owned the road and others shared it with me, if I wanted them to. Now, I am a more courteous drive and I let people in front of me and I try to be nice. Driving activity from other that use to upset me, does not bother me anymore.
- As I have been saying earlier, I have a difficult time motivating myself to exercise. I still need it for weight control and health. It use to be easy for me to go 3 or 4 times a week. Monday was my first time in 2 months. I have got to find away to get back in the gym.
As I recognize more mental.changes, I will let you know. Of course, physical changes are still occurring but they have slowed down. I will discuss those changes in a future post, probably next week during my monthly measurement.