Sunday April 12, 2015 - Shopping at the mall

Leaving the high school, I decided to get something to eat. I went to Wendy's and ordered a small chili and a jr hamburger. I was not hungry but I needed to eat something to keep my metabolism up. I had not eaten all day and it was about 2 pm. My body has probably moved into starvation mode.

While inside, I sat to eat while checking emails and replying to texts.

I decided I wanted to go visit my old stomping ground as a teen, which was the Mall. Older readers remember the Mall as the place to go to not only shop but to hang out with friends.

I remember when Woodbridge Mall opened. We use to go as a family and later I went with friends.

So, I drove over to the Mall. As I was looking for a place to park, it occurred to me, what shops do I want to visit. I realized, I no longer go to Malls. I go to the open shopping centers because the stores I like.

Many malls have been converted into open shopping centers that look more like downtown areas. But this mall appeared busy. I decided to go to Lord and Taylor because that was my mother's favorite store. I remember my mother was a shopaholic. I remember wanting to do some mother daughter shopping with her. When I was young and went to the mall with Mom, I had to look disinterested in the lady's section. But in reality, I wanted to try on dresses and shoes.



 Luckily, in the early 1990's, I was able to spend a day with my mother shopping as her daughter. Now in 2015, I am back at her store looking cute and "window" shopping. The clothes are very nice but out of my price range.

So, I headed into the mall and just walked around remembering the mall's layout. I remember people saying this was the largest Mall in the US, back when it opened. I do not know if that was true but it is a two story mall built in a T-shape with very long walkways. Currently, it appeared to be 100% occupied and busy.

As I walked around, I was basically ignored as people went about their activities.

One time in Atlanta, about 20 years ago, another "crossdresser" as I went shopping in the local mall. We passed a group of your girl teenagers and one of them said, "Look two crossdressers." as they watched us enter a shop. They left, but I felt like I was in a fish bowl and uncomfortable. Being with my friend helped, but it ruined an otherwise nice outing. It made me not want to go to the mall again, as Susan and I have not until today.

Its interesting that I remember the bad times more that the good time while dressed. That incident was the second time I was called out in the mall, while dressed in the 1990's. The second time was in Savannah in 1996, while spending the whole week as Susan. I had been to that local mall a couple of times (to buy shoes and get acrylic nails). This third time, as I walked into the mall, one guy said in a loud voice, there is a crossdresser. I felt so embarrassed, I turned around and left. This guy was with another guy and they followed me to my car. I got in and left. I did not go back to that mall, the rest of the week. My confidence took a big hit that day.

Now, 2015, as I walked around, I felt part of the community. A few women smiled and said hello and I looked them in the eye and returned the greetings.

Then I found my store, Payless Shoes. I went in but they had a very limited number of size 12 shoes.

I did find these creme heels, but I wanted a pair in black. I like the round toe shoe because it makes my feet appear smaller.

I employee asked, if I needed help. I told her I was looking for this shoe in black. She told me that they did not have a pair in black.

I then asked her if they had any lace foot cover in XL size. I bought a pair that I found in XL and it fit. Since then, I have been looking for more pairs in different colors that are an XL size. I originally found these items and put them on my Etsy board.

I have a brown pair. I want to collect more colors because they match my lace camisoles.

Next, I went to the food court and bought a pretzel. I sat at a table and practiced eating slowly with small bites while reading emails. I sat up straight (like my mother use to tell my sister) and crossed my ankles and bent  my knees slightly to the side.

Finally, Susan is shopping at Woodbridge Mall and having fun. If only my mother was here to hangout with me :-{. But she is here is spirit.

NOTE: My mother is alive in Orlando, but is in the final stages of Dementia.