Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Tuesday March 21, 2017 - Retrospective

I woke up early this morning. Too early. I was sleeping on my side and I felt the weight of my breasts pulling me down toward the bed. I had never felt that before.

It made me stop and think about all the changes I have gone through this past year.

For at least 30 years, if not 35 years, I have shaved my legs weekly. I hated hairy legs. Then about 15 years ago, I started shaving my whole body, including my arm pits and genital area. I wanted to look as feminine as possible.

Slowly but surely, since 2010, I tried to reduce my maleness by losing weight, then facial hair removal and finally going out as Susan without shame or anxiety.

Then I started HRT 9 months ago. I have realized how much I have really changed. I love the way I look and feel. Finally, when I get up in the morning and get to the bathroom mirror, I see femininity. Its in my face,its how my breasts move and how I feel.

I no longer shave my legs or body or spend all that extra time on my body. I still take care of my body but I do not need to do any extra to reduce my maleness because I am female.

I remember wanting to be able to have breasts large enough that my hands can not cover them. I dreamed about that for decades. Now it has happened. My breasts are filling out with a very feminine appearance. They are not projecting out more but filling in and having a more mature shape. I think that is why this morning, they felt different.

The 36C bras fit well and look so good. I bought a couple of more yesterday and donated my 36A bras along with some old shirts.

It is going to be over 80 degrees in Atlanta today. So it reminds me of the coming Spring and Summer and how I want to present. I noticed recently that even with my sports bras, my breasts are difficult to hide. I no longer try to hide them. But I do layer over them when in boy mode. The warm weather will cause me to adapt my layering.

My plan was to keep this blog going until June 2018, which will make 2 years on HRT. But I can tell after on 9 months on HRT, my interests are changing and may not belong in this blog.

Clothes, makeup, voice and other changes that use to be of interest to me, do not interest me that much. I wear my female clothes as part of my regular wardrobe. I have some nice things, but I am not motivated to continue to build that wardrobe.

I will find things to write about and discuss my changes, I just hope the continued evolution of this blog helps others understand what could happen. I had planned on being full-time by May or June 2017.

My presentation my not become female 24/7, but mentally, I am full-time and I am so happy with that.

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