Friday, March 31, 2017

Friday March 31, 2017 - Doctor's appointment yesterday

Yesterday, I finally got in to see my doctor. We had a good talk and I told him about the positive effects of the hormones and that I like where I am.

My hormone levels were in the normal female range, based on my December 2016 blood readings. My doctor signed me up for a new free service that will allow me to monitor my blood readings online. So I will know my March 2017 blood results next week.

This is good because I changed my regime about a month ago and I would like to see how it affected my results. I did tell my doctor of the change and he recommended that I not change.

We had an honest talk about sex and he discussed a new drug he is recommending. He had recommended Cialis during my last visit. However, like Viagra, its is very expensive.

The active ingredient in Viagra is now in a generic form. While Viagra or Cialis is about $10 per pill,  Sildenafil is about $0.50 per pill. So he gave me a prescription.

Over the past week, I have been having a difficult time sleeping. This morning I woke up, not feeling right. I think the change in my hormone regime is having an slow but steady impact. I have decided to go back to my original regime and add the new prescription.

I feel like I am in "no-woman's land" as I can not feel my femininity nor my masculinity. I want to go back to being able to cry more and feel my surroundings. I feel that male wall coming back.

Based on what I have been reading over the years in my HRT yahoo group, I though that after I reached female levels, my estradiol would be enough to keep me at those levels. So I reduced my Spirolactone (200 mg to 100 mg) and Finasteride (5 mg to 0). It has taken awhile, but I can feel a change and my lack of sleeping may also be a result.

Even though, I do not feel the need to dress much, that inner femininity is very important to me and now it not as strong it was. I want it, no I need it to be strong again.

Once I got a taste of Susan, I can not nor will not go back. It's who I am and have always been.

Thursday, March 30, 2017

Thursday March 30, 2017 - Transitioning at 90 years old



WWII veteran decides to live as transgender woman at age 90

A former male World War II veteran has decided to live as a transgender woman at the age of 90. The soldier, formerly known as Peter, is intent on fully becoming Patricia in her tenth decade - and has begun taking female hormones.

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Wednesday March 29, 2017 - Makeup tips and tricks

I found this short video with some nice transwoman makeup tips. For me the concealer under the eyes, contouring and using a sponge to apply your foundation, has really made a big difference.

The two pictures below show on the left (3 months pre-HRT) vs on the right (6 months into HRT)

There are many differences, such as lighting and overall face look. However, I hope you maybe able to see the makeup and how much better is was applied.



The video is below


Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Tuesday March 28, 2017 - Applying Makeup

For years, I tried applying makeup with mixed results. It was not until I went to Ulta Beauty and had a makeover, that I found my way. The lady was young and had some really great ideas.

The biggest for me was applying foundation with a sponge. I use to use my hand but the sponge provided a nice finished look. Also, I learned how to use two different foundation colors. This also made a big difference.

Below is a makeup infographic about the do's and don't of makeup. I found it interesting that I now do mostly the dos, after my Ulta makeover.

Monday, March 27, 2017

Monday March 27, 2017 - Skirt length

Understanding female fashion terminology helps when presenting as female. Below is a nice concise infographic about dress/skirt length.

I am in the #3 short skirt to #5 above the calf skirt length. I am too old for #1 and #2 and too young for #6 and #7 (except formal), Lol.




P.S.: I went out of town Saturday and forgot to take my laptop and computer bag. I was so busy with meetings and  traveling Sunday, I was not able to get a Sunday [\post up. It is the first day, I have missed in over 1 year.  It felt weird not getting a post up.

Saturday, March 25, 2017

Saturday March 25, 2017 - An HRT Drawing story

This a video from a transwoman who made a set of drawings about her life on HRT. Everyones experience on HRT will be different.


Friday, March 24, 2017

Friday March 24, 2017 - Purchased 2 new bras

I purchased two new bras this week. I was looking for a basic black and a basic white bra. But I could not fine either one at my new store.

The blue bra below is similar to one I purchased in size 36B. I like the lace and its coverage. I have some room to grow in this bra and its understates me.


The black laces bra was my first front clasp bra. Its difficult to clip but its padded and gives me a bustier look. I wore it under my black/white top on Thursday and I really liked the look.







I am still going to hunt for a basic black and a basic white bra. But I have a nice set of 36C bras for now. I am going to donate my 36B bras next week.

Thursday, March 23, 2017

Thursday March 23, 2017 - Doctor's appointment

Traffic in Atlanta is terrible and getting worse. I left in plenty of time to make my appointment today. Its my third quarterly appointment.

I was caught behind two bad accidents and missed my appointment. I had to reschedule for next Thursday.

I was upset, but I take it in stride now. I just turned around and went home. I have so much work to do, I decided not to go shopping today.

If you followed this blog over the years, you may remember that I would be out shopping most of the day for shoes, clothes and beauty items during an appointment day. Its just not as big a priority for me now. Next Thursday, I will plan to shop after my appointment.

Today I wore my black short sleave top with some grey skinny pants, black flats and black/white coat. I noticed that I need to get some sun on my body. My skin needs to tan because since I was covered over the fall and winter, my face is a little to dark when compared to my body. This happens every year. I am going to the beach Saturday and will try and get a tan.



My coat did not fit right. I love this coat but my larger breasts push out the coat's neckline and the collar does not sit right.

But the top fits better because of the larger breasts and the fullness above the collar which has a nice box cut across my chest.

Here are a couple of quick pictures.



Too much shadow over my face makes it took a little darker than the above picture.








Thursday March 23, 2017 - I had a meeting with a transgender student

About two months ago, I was eating lunch at the college cafeteria and noticed a student with eyeliner and fake eyelashes. After I made my salad, I sat next to him and told him I liked his eyelashes. He smiles and thus began a discussion about being a transwoman.

Since, then we have met for lunch a few more times. Two days ago, He (I am going to use the male pronoun because of how he is presenting while in college) emailed me about wanting to talk about HRT.

Yesterday, we met for lunch. He stated that he talked to his parents and was interested in starting HRT and moving toward womanhood and SRS.

I spent 1 hour discussing the issue in detail with him.

First he stated that our previous meetings gave him the nerve to tell him parents. He only wished he could have done it while he was a pre-teen, so he could transition earlier. I smiled and said, I would like to have started HRT at 30 instead of 60 but its not about the past and at 21, he has 50 years or more to live as a woman, so do not worry losing 8 years. Also at 21, the hormones will still make a major change both physically and emotionally.

He likes and dates men, and finds being transwoman more difficult in his dating life. He would like to become a woman, so he can date "straight" men. I told him that transitioning is so much more that your sex life or even your dating life.

I went over with him, what HRT has done to me over the past 10 months. Physically, I love the feminine changes, but you lose your sex drive and your male part does not work the same. The mental changes are even more impactful.

I recommended that he needs to finish college (3 semesters away), go to graduate school and concentrate on getting highly educated, so he can get a high paying career that will allow him to transition easier. He is a sociology major.  Many graduate schools aggressively seek Morehouse College graduates so  he should be able to get a masters degree or PhD at no cost to him.

I discussed the elimination of his beard. Of course he shaves, but I could tell by his beard shadow, that he has a heavy beard. I showed him a picture of me, when I was a college student and that it took four years at over $10,000 to get rid of it.

I told him that while he is spending the next four years getting educated, he should eliminate his beard.

At the end, he agreed that he will wait and not start HRT now. His main reason is that he does not want to lose his sex drive and that he is successful at presenting as a part-time female. He wants to transition but sees that waiting until he is financially ready is very important.

I am not against his transition nor is starting of HRT, I just wanted him to understand the importance of being ready financially and reaching his maximum education level. It will make the transition so much easier.

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Wednesday March 22, 2017 - Eyebrows

Eyebrows help frame your face and can project a hint of femininity, even when in guy mode. In the late 1990's, I had my eyebrows permanently shaped by going to an electrologist. It made a difference in my look and nobody mentioned it.

Below is a nice inforgraphic about eyebrows. This is followed by two short videos. If you are not shaping your eyebrows, think about doing it yourself or have them done.



HOW TO SHAPE





DIY

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Tuesday March 21, 2017 - Retrospective

I woke up early this morning. Too early. I was sleeping on my side and I felt the weight of my breasts pulling me down toward the bed. I had never felt that before.

It made me stop and think about all the changes I have gone through this past year.

For at least 30 years, if not 35 years, I have shaved my legs weekly. I hated hairy legs. Then about 15 years ago, I started shaving my whole body, including my arm pits and genital area. I wanted to look as feminine as possible.

Slowly but surely, since 2010, I tried to reduce my maleness by losing weight, then facial hair removal and finally going out as Susan without shame or anxiety.

Then I started HRT 9 months ago. I have realized how much I have really changed. I love the way I look and feel. Finally, when I get up in the morning and get to the bathroom mirror, I see femininity. Its in my face,its how my breasts move and how I feel.

I no longer shave my legs or body or spend all that extra time on my body. I still take care of my body but I do not need to do any extra to reduce my maleness because I am female.

I remember wanting to be able to have breasts large enough that my hands can not cover them. I dreamed about that for decades. Now it has happened. My breasts are filling out with a very feminine appearance. They are not projecting out more but filling in and having a more mature shape. I think that is why this morning, they felt different.

The 36C bras fit well and look so good. I bought a couple of more yesterday and donated my 36A bras along with some old shirts.

It is going to be over 80 degrees in Atlanta today. So it reminds me of the coming Spring and Summer and how I want to present. I noticed recently that even with my sports bras, my breasts are difficult to hide. I no longer try to hide them. But I do layer over them when in boy mode. The warm weather will cause me to adapt my layering.

My plan was to keep this blog going until June 2018, which will make 2 years on HRT. But I can tell after on 9 months on HRT, my interests are changing and may not belong in this blog.

Clothes, makeup, voice and other changes that use to be of interest to me, do not interest me that much. I wear my female clothes as part of my regular wardrobe. I have some nice things, but I am not motivated to continue to build that wardrobe.

I will find things to write about and discuss my changes, I just hope the continued evolution of this blog helps others understand what could happen. I had planned on being full-time by May or June 2017.

My presentation my not become female 24/7, but mentally, I am full-time and I am so happy with that.


Monday, March 20, 2017

Monday March 20, 2017 - New poll

A new poll by the Human Rights Campaign (HRC), shows that the number of people saying they know someone who is transgendered  is increasing. Also those who know a transperson are much more likely to support transgender rights.

This is one reason why telling others about our story is important and helps all of us. I suspect that even those we tell, who do not support us, become more moderate because they can put a face on the issue.



There has been a steady increase in Americans who report knowing someone who is transgender.

  1.  In 2013, the Public Religion Research Institute reported that roughly 1-in-10 (9%) Americans reported having a close friend or family member who is transgender. 
  2. In 2014, when HRC asked survey respondents, “Thinking specifically about transgender people, do you personally know or work with someone who is transgender?” 17 percent said they did. 
  3. In 2015, the number was 22 percent. 
  4. In 2016, just over a year later, it has jumped by 13 percentage points to 35 percent.

For those who said they “personally know or work with someone who is transgender,” their favorability for “transgender people” is 66 percent, with 13 percent unfavorable. That’s a net favorability of +53 percentage points.  66-13

Compare that to those who said they “do not” personally know or work with a transgender person. The rating for those who don’t is 37 favorable, 30 unfavorable, a net of only +7. (The margin of error for this survey subgroup was 6.67 percent). 37-30


HRC National Survey of Likely Voters | Human Rights Campaign

The Takeaway: More Americans Know and Accept Transgender People Results from a new national survey commissioned by the Human Rights Campaign (HRC), the nation's largest lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer civil rights organization, reveal a significant uptick in the number of Americans who say they personally know or work with someone who is transgender.

Sunday, March 19, 2017

Sunday March 19, 2017 - D.C. Opens first multi-user all gender bathroom.

This is an interesting development (experiment). I agree with D.C.'s ordinance that all single user bathrooms becoming family bathrooms. I am interested to see how this multi-user family bathroom works out. Will cis-woman use this bathroom?


D.C. installs first multi-user "all gender" bathrooms in Reeves Center

On Thursday, the D.C. Office of Human Rights, D.C. Department of General Services, and the Mayor's Office of LGBTQ Affairs announced that the city has installed the first "all gender" restrooms in a government building in the District. The two restrooms, which are located in the Reeves Center, at 2000 14th St.

Friday, March 17, 2017

Friday March 17, 2017 - I told my Former boss and mentor of 40 years

As part of my current plan, I am telling my oldest friends about my transgender issues. Earlier this year I told my best friend of 50 years.

Yesterday, I had lunch with my former boss. We spent about ten minutes updating each other about or children and grandchildren. He and his wife are the godparents for my youngest daughter.

I meet him in 1977, when as a college Jr, I took one of his first classes, Principle of Finance. I was an accounting major and I found finance fascinating. I was memorized my this young teacher and the subject. Over that semester, I met with him as I decided that I wanted to change from accounting to finance. At the time Morehouse did not have a finance major. So he suggested a masters program in the northeast. I decide I did not want to go back up north. So I enter Georgia State. At the time he was finishing his Ph.D. in Real Estate fiance at the same school.

After receiving my MBA, he recommend that I apply for a job at Morehouse. After a few years he became Dean and my boss for 30+ years. He retired and I followed him out the door. Currently, we own a real estate consulting business.

I started by telling him I feel great. I thanked him for 40 years of mentorship and friendship.

I was the motivating factor for him to lose weight and get in shape back in 2010. So I told him that the real reason why I lost all that weight in 2010 was because I have gender dysphoria and have been battling it for 50 years.

He is very analytical, so we spent the next 30 minutes talking about gender issues and how society is coming around to the fact gender is blurring. He was very supportive and thanked me for telling him.

I showed him my recent picture with his goddaughter.


It always surprises me how much she looks like me.

I also showed him my blog picture.


He was surprised how natural I look and would have never guessed.

We then moved on to business issues. I have two large projects what will start and I need some of his labor hours in both projects.

Overall, our talk went well. This is my third of four talks with people I have know over 40 years. I will then move on to those I have know for 20 years or less until I reach out to all friends.

Even though I changed my plans and I am not planning to present 24/7, I still want to come out on an individual basis to everyone. I think that will also help our cause because polling shows that people who know someone who is a transwoman or transman is more supportive of our rights.

Next Thursday is my nine month medical check up. I can not wait to talk to my doctor about revised plans.






Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Tuesday March 14, 2017 - Bra Shopping

Yesterday, I received a text about a 50% sale at the local Thrift Store. This is a newer store, where they hang up and label the bras. So I decided to go and maybe buy something.

Shopping for bras in boy mode is no longer an issues for me. I remember the days, when I could not build up the nerve to shop for female items in boy mode.  But my time in 2015, presenting as a femboy, taught me that people really do not care. I received more positive compliments when presenting as a feminine male than I do when presenting as a male or female.

While shopping, I found two 36C bras, that I liked.


I like this bra because the straps are to the side and the way the cups are placed, it gives a push up and lift. I look fuller and this bra would work during the warm months and a lower cut neckline. This is a nice push up style bra.

The stars on the side are cute. The red color will mean that this bra will not work with certain lighter tops. I was looking for a black bra and a white one, but could not find either color.


This is a full coverage bar. The cups cover me fully and the straps are more toward the center than the red bra straps.

I plan on wearing this bra for support under an outfit with a higher neckline. For example, I could wear this under a sweater.

I like the color and the embroidery on the cups.


The best part of the purchase was the price. Each bra costs only $2.62. With 50% off, I decided to purchase any bra that was a 36C. These were the only two in that size. I am going to go there every time I get a 50% off text, just to check out the inventory.

Monday, March 13, 2017

Monday March 13, 2017 - Mental changes after 9 months

Times moves so fast. It's hard for me to imagine I have only 3 more months (March, April & May) before I reach 1 year.

Mentally, I have changed quite a bit. Mental changes are hard to identify month-to-month, but when you look back over a longer time horizon, you can see the changes.







Since last March, (2016) I can identify many changes:

  1. I did not watch one college basketball game this year. I could not tell you anything about the teams in March Madness. Last year and since the 1980's, I watched March Madness in great detail. As in every year, March Madness is during college spring break week, so I usually have the time.
  2. I have not listened to the local sports radio channel since about November 2016. In March 2016, I listened to it everyday, all day.
  3. I listen to Youtube playlists I created. I listen to music all day and get great joy from it. I never listened to much music. Only during college, did I listen to some music.
  4. I am no longer driven to dress. I have not dressed or gone out as Susan since I was in Tenn with my daughter in January. I wear a bra everyday (need to), but I am secure in who I am. Maybe this spring, I will feel like presenting female, But if not, I just add as much or as little femininity as I feel that day.
  5. I am in a very calm mental state. Things do not bother me and I try not to get upset. I do cry more and feel so much more from music. 
  6. I started going to church every Sunday and I like it. The music and the messages help me through the week.
  7. I buy mostly men's clothes. My dad would probably be so happy. I have not purchased any female clothes (except bras) since last fall. The female clothes, I do wear around the house, I have owned since 2016.
  8. I love how my body looks (including my face). I can see femininity and it's great.
My plans were to be full-time after May/June 2017. But I  love where I am now. It might change, but my only plan now is to stay on HRT and see where life takes me.

My business is doing very well and I have more time to concentrate on it. That includes the time, I use to stress about dressing.

Sunday, March 12, 2017

Sunday March 12, 2017 - 9 Month HRT Measurements

Below are my current measurements and the change since last month. The picture is followed by an explanation and then a table showing the monthly changes since I began HR on June 10, 2016.




The above chart shows that last month all of my measurements increased except my hips (Darn!). I believe this is due to me finding a solution to my diabetes thru diet. By adding a large amount of protein, my glucose levels stay down during the day. Also, I must eat something every two hours to keep by body from going into starvation mode which tells my body to begin to release more glucose into my system..

In March, I will stabilize my weight and return to a stricter eating regimen and try to get back into the gym.

The difference in size between my above breast area and breast line dropped slightly to 3.00 inches. I believe this is due to my breast filling out.

 The difference between the area under my breast line (bra band) and my breast line increased from 6.00" to 6.50".

My 36C bras have become my bra of choice. I need buy some more.

My breast are filling out nicely (good genes), but my hips are not.

My waist at my belly button did increase and I could tell by my pants.

Overall I am happy with my results. I still need to figure out how to get back into the gym..

The only real change this month is my slight increase in breast volume.



AREA 0 Day 30 DAYS 60 DAYS 90 DAYS 120 DAYS 150 DAYS 180 DAYS 210 DAYS 240 DAYS 270 DAYS
SHOULDER
?
45.0
45.0 43.0 43.0 41.0 41.0 42.0 41.5 42.5
ABOVE BREAST 37 37.0 37.5 36.0 36.5 36.5 38.0 36.0 36.5 38.0
BUST LINE 38 39.0 39.5 38.50 39.75 39.00 40.0 39.5 40.0 41.0
BRA BAND 36 35.0 35.5 34.75 35.0 34.25 34.5 34.0 34.0 34.5
WAIST@BELLY BUTTON 38 36.0 37.0 36.5 37.0 36.5 35.5 35.0 35.0 36.0
HIPS 40 40.0 40.0 40.0 39.5 39.5 39.5 39.0 39.0 39.0
THIGHS 37 37.0 37.0 36.5 36.0 36.0 36.5 36.0 36.0 37.0
HIPS VS SHOULDERS -- 5.0 5.0 3.0 2.0 1.5 1.5 3.0 2.5 3.5
BUST LINE VS ABOVE BREAST 1.0 2.0 2.0 2.5 3.25 2.5 2.0 3.5 3.5 3.0
BUST LINE VS BRA BAND 2.0 4.0 4.0 3.25 4.75 4.75 5.5 5.5 6.0 6.5



My physical goals for Month 9 were:
  1. Keep losing weight (did not work due to trying to cure blood sugar levels)
  2. Get my waist down to 34" (did not work due to cure blood sugar levels)

My physical goals for Month 10 are:

  1. Get calorie count back under control
  2. back in gym
  3. Try to keep losing weight 
  4. Get my waist to 34"


Friday, March 10, 2017

Friday March 10, 2017 - Polling continues to show support

The Huffington Post just released a poll about the Transgender Bathroom issue. It shows to that the community continues oppose these bills. However it's where the votes are located that matter the most.


Thursday, March 9, 2017

Thursday March 9, 2017 - End of Month 9

Tomorrow will start HRT Month 10 and I will take my monthly measurements. I am feeling really good and love my changes.

This morning, I tried on both a 36B and 36C bras. I wanted to see the difference. I have been wearing my 36B bras. However, went I wear them, I fail as a regular guy. But I do not care. I have noticed as the weather is warming and Spring is in the air, I want to look pretty. So I will probably present more female.

Below is a picture is one of my tops I wore yesterday. I was home all day working but felt like wearing it.



Today I compared my 36B bra with one of my 36C bras. I think I am going to start buying only 36C.

The C-cup fits and looks much better then the B-cup. The B-cup is starting to remind me of my old A-cup bras when they were getting too small.

36B














36C













I will post my new body measurements Friday or Saturday.

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

Tuesday March 7, 2017 - Transman film is finally being released.

3 Generations has been set by The Weinstein Company for a May 5 release in New York and Los Angeles — 20 months after it was pulled from release.


Monday, March 6, 2017

Monday March 6, 2017 - Trans-bigotry meme destroyed in one Facebook post

A Virginia high school teacher wrote a facebook response to the following bigoted meme.



The response:




The facts that backup the response:

  • Insects use an XO sex determination system, while birds use the ZW system.
  • A reptile’s sex is at least partly determined by the temperature in which the egg develops.
  • Flatworms transfer sperm through a process called penis fencing (which is described in graphic detail here).
  • In clownfish colonies, dominance is based on size, the female being the largest and the male being the second largest. If the female dies, the male gains weight and becomes the female for that group.
  • Other fish species take on female attributes while mating, and they release sperm in the process.
  • Fungi like molds and mushrooms have 36,000 sexes.
Humans also exhibit the wide range of sexual behaviors Grace discusses:

  • 5-alpha-reductase deficiency is a real (albeit rare) condition, in which young women grow a penis during puberty.
  • Androgen insensitivity syndrome is an intersex condition in which a person who is genetically male is resistant to male hormones . As a result, the person has some or all of the physical traits of a woman, but the genetic makeup of a man.
  • The SRY gene is involved in male sexual development—without it fetuses can be genetically male (with XY chromosomes) but have a female body. The same is true in females (with XX chromosomes), who can develop a male body without the SRY gene.
  • XXY males are sterile, with small testes—while women with only one X chromosome (a condition called Turner syndrome) are infertile and don’t go through puberty. Males with two X chromosomes (called Klinefelter syndrome) are taller, with a higher risk of breast cancer and osteoporosis.

Sunday, March 5, 2017

Sunday March 5, 2017 - How to use the word transgender.

In writing posts over the past few years, I have had trouble figuring out how to use the word transgender. Below is a nice short article about how to use the word.



How Should You Correctly Be Using The Word 'Transgender'?

Saturday, March 4, 2017

Saturday March 4, 2017 - My bras

I finally figured out, the best way to store my bras.



I did not realize how many bras I  bought in the past year. I still need a few more 36B bras. I am going to get a black bra and a white bra. I saw a black 36B bra, but I did not buy it because I thought my current black bra was a 36B. It was a 36A.



Here are my old 36A bras

I am going to take these 36A bras to the thrift store.



Here are my 36B bras


I want to add a white bra and a black bra.


Here are my new 36C bras


I am going to start looking for 36C bras for my future wardrobe.

Friday, March 3, 2017

Friday March 3, 2017 - Changed to my HRT regimen

I can not believe I am almost at the end of month 9. It goes so fast.

In June 2016,  I was placed on:

  1.  2 mg of Estradiol twice a day 4 mg total
  2. 100 mg of Spironolactone twice a day 200 mg total
  3. 5 mg of Finasteride once a day.

I have been a member, since 2011  of a yahoo group that discusses MTF HRT treatments. Along with additional readings and research, I was able to know enough about HRT to have a good discussion with my doctor.  I felt his regimen was appropriate.

The medicine has changed me so much physically and mentally. I am very satisfied with the results.

However, about 2 weeks ago I decided to change my regimen by reducing my Spironolactone from 200 mg to 100 mg and stop taking the Finasteride. The Spironolactone reduced testosterone and the Finasteride reduced DHT which is the testosterone by-product that leads to male pattern baldness.

I have been bald for decades and I read that once your testosterone is low enough, the Estradiol will keep the testosterone low and 100 mg or less of Spironolactone will be enough to help the Estradiol keep the testosterone low.

I am on Day 12 of this change and I noticed a slight difference. Mentally, I am not in the same place. Its hard to describe, but I do not feel the same. Its very slight, but I feel it. About 5 days ago, I had my first XXX dream in months. Also, I am aware of my male organ again.

Therefore, I suspect my testosterone level is up. My dysphoria is not back and I am still physically changing, but mentally I feel I am going backward.

So I am going back to my original regimen. I do not want to screw around with my medicine. But, this short experiment shows me how much I have mentally changed.

On March 23rd, I  back to my Doctor and I am going to discuss this in detail with him. I hope he will get too upset. But expect him to not want me to experiment anymore. And I agree.





Thursday, March 2, 2017

Thursday March 2, 2017 - Bra Shopping

Finally! Yesterday, I went bra shopping. I have been trying to get out and shop for weeks, but I have been so busy.

I wanted to buy a few 36C bras as I continue to grow and fill-out the 36B bras.
I was in boy mode but it did not both me.

The store had a 50% off coupon for seniors. So I went in and walked to the bra rack. Along with other woman, I had to look at every single bra that was hanging up and look for a size tag.

I found three bras that I like and I think are cute. They only cost $4.72 total. That makes it even better.


One was a 36B




The last two bras are 36C.





I have realized, that I am getting a nice selection of bras. I needed to learn how to store them so that they keep their form. This video gave me some good ideas.