Monday, October 31, 2016

Monday October 31, 2016 - Happy Halloween - nice makeup

The following short video is what Halloween is all about for young boys exploring who they are. He looks so happy and a great job was done on the makeup.

Sunday, October 30, 2016

Sunday October 30, 2016 - Transwoman appearing mainstream

Yesterday, I found this video about PrEP. I like the normalcy of this video. The subtle node that this is a transwoman, is a nice touch.

I believe that showing transgender people as normal everyday Americans dealing with everyday issues, helps the public see us as a normal part of the community.

"PrEP” stands for Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis. PrEP is a way for people who don’t have HIV but who are at very high risk of getting it to prevent HIV infection by taking a pill every day. The pill contains two medicines that are also used to treat HIV. If you take PrEP and are exposed to HIV through sex or injection drug use, these medicines can work to keep the virus from taking hold in your body. Source

Saturday, October 29, 2016

Saturday October 29, 2016 - High Sugar levels

Back in February 2010, I was getting a new term life insurance policy. A nurse came by and took a blood sample. The next week, my insurance agent told me that the insurance company was worried about my sugar level and that I was becoming diabetic.

So they sent me to their doctor who gave me a diabetic kit and prescription. I said to myself that I am not going to take insulin. So I read about natural alternatives and found that diet and exercise can help control it.

We were coming out of that devastating recession and the stress was killing people,causing heart attacks  and strokes. I had lost three associates within the past two years. So I began to thing of my own mortality.

It was at that point I decided that if I wanted to transition, it was now or never. So to get ready to transition and to control my blood sugar, I changed my eating and began exercising. By September 2011, I had lose weight (65 lbs) and was eating healthy. Plus I looked great in a size 8/10 dress.

Up until October 2015, I did great. But with my grandkids living with me, I lost control of my strict eating and by the time I started HRT, I lost my motivation for heavy cardio.

Last Saturday, I was tested for a new glaucoma study and a blood text was taken. I was called by the Doctor and told that my blood sugar was high 400+. I was surprised but I figured that I had eaten 2 donuts for breakfast.

So this week, I am recommitting the my eating lifestyle and will return to heavy cardio (120 min+). In the meantime, I am going to test various foods, my HRT meds and exercise, to see their impact my sugar level.

I noticed that after I worked out Thursday night for 1 hr, my sugar level dropped to 171. Also, my HRT meds do not seem to impact my sugar level.

I guess every once in awhile I still need a good kick to straighten up.

Friday, October 28, 2016

Friday October 28, 2016 - Artificial Nails

I love artificial nails. I have worn them only a few times.Currently,  I get a pedicure and my toe nails painted but I do not wear artificial finger nails. Currently, HRT is helping me (either directly or indirectly) grow my finger nails without biting them (reduced stress) or having them break (stronger nails).

My question has always been which type of artificial nails to use. Below is the information to help you answer the pros and cons of different nails.

Above is a list of different nail shapes.I like the round and almond styles. These two styles appear more natural.

Below shows the list of gel versus acrylic nails.

Below is a short video that does a good job of discussing the difference.

Thursday, October 27, 2016

Thursday October 27, 2016 - A new commercial staring a transgender person.

I can definitely identify with this commercial.

In this Secret deodorant ad,  Karis Wilde, a transperson is debating her exit from a busy woman's bathroom. Though she does not say anything, I know exactly what’s going through her mind and having a good deodorant is a must.

Thursday October 27, 2016 - Holloween weekend

One year my mother asked me if I wanted to dress as a girl for Halloween. I quickly said no. She and my Dad knew about my crossdressing as they discovered my stash. So I was being sent to a youth group at a clinic for children with issues.

At the time, I said no for a variety of reasons. The main reason was that "crossdressing" was not a joke to me. I did not want to wear something that was funny,  mocked woman or did not look convincing.

If I were to crossdress, I wanted to look good.

Second, I was basically, by being in this youth group, it was being told indirectly that wanting to crossdress was bad and telling anyone about it was bad. So why would I expose myself?

But as I think about it now, I think my mother was being more helpful that I thought and was trying to help me in her own 1960's way. Later in the 1990's she embraced my crossdressing. She even spent the day with me shopping and having lunch as Susan. She even complimented me and said I looked like an aunt of hers. During my May 1996 trip to Hilton Head, she took me shopping to buy a few outfits for the trip.

I now think that if I were growing up today's society, she would have embraced my femininity and my Dad would have gone along. My mother was very head strong but from behind the scenes because it was the 1950' and 1960's. In today's society she would have supported me more directly.

My mother passed away 11 months ago. This Halloween, I am going to do something special for her.

Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Wednesday October 26, 2016 - Lingerie

A great way for me to deal with my dsyphoria was with lingerie. I have some really nice camisoles  that I use to match with my panties and wear, under my male clothes, during the fall and winter. I would also wear baby doll and chemise tops to bed. It would help me get a good night sleep.

The picture on the right are three examples of the type of camisoles, I wear. The blue is a nice T-shirt style with a longer hemline. The red spaghetti strap top is my favorite style. I have them in many colors and they work well under my male shirts. I have a few strapless tops. But I do not wear them often.

The feel and femininity of them is so nice and they help with those feelings.You may notice they are all lace. I use to have them in a soft satin material, but over time I was able to replace them with lace ones.

If your Significant Other does not approve of wearing them to bed, then wearing a nice camisole under your male clothes, helps. As a matter of fact, I got this suggestion from my Mother in the early 1990's. After I came out to my parents by telling them  that I was  not "cured", my Mother recommended that I find some soft and pretty camisoles to wear like a T-shirt under my male clothes. Thanks Mom.

Below is an infographic of different types of lingerie. I wear baby doll, camisole and chemise styles.

Tuesday, October 25, 2016

Tuesday October 25, 2016 - A transgender teenager with support.

In the recent Dr. Phil show about a Transgender teen without family support, he brought in and talked to a transgender teen with a supportive family.

Its amazing the difference in appearance and confidence.

Monday, October 24, 2016

Monday October 24, 2016 - Tracheal Shave: Adam's Adam reduction

I have decided that I am not interesting in having this surgery. It was never really on my ToDo list. My adam's apple is prominent and is probably a give away. But my own cost-benefit analysis came to the conclusion early on, that I was not that important to me.

I did notice that as I have gotten older, the skin on my neck is sagging and thus reducing the prominence of my adam's apple.

This is one of the main reasons for my slower journey. To allow me to decide which change is most important to helping me get the my goal. Since starting HRT, my goal seems elusive. It use to be, my goal was, 24/7 living as Susan and being stealth. It still is but its no longer the driving force.

As I change physically, I am changing mentally. By dsyphoria is gone. I love what is happening and feel so much better. I am enjoying this journey and I am stopping to "smell the roses" and adjust to the changes. Eventually I will find my destination, but I no longer know exactly where that destination will be.


Sunday, October 23, 2016

Sunday October 23, 2016 - Glaucoma study and HRT

Yesterday, I started a 90-day Glaucoma study which is testing a new medicine. I did not qualify for a two-year study because the size of my eye lenses were very slightly outside the study's required size. I had passed 3 previous tests, but failed the forth by a millimeter. DARN!

 I really want that 2 year study because along with the pay $200/mo, they would provide me with 2 years of medicine and medical coverage.

I had to wake up at 5:30 am to leave my house at 6:00 am, to make a 7:15 am appointment. I made because there was zero traffic. Its amazing that you can drive 1 hour and 15 minutes and still be in Fulton County.

As I was asked medical questions, the Dr asked me about prescription drugs. I told him I was in transition from MTF and I was taking 3 meds under my Dr.'s supervision. I could not remember how to spell or pronoun all three meds. He had a phone app on his phone that looked up all three meds based on male to female transition.

I was is boy mode and he did not flinch when I told him which medicine and the amount I take per day.. He did ask me how long I had been taking them and if I had any side affects. I could tell he wanted to ask more but did not know how to ask. So I gave him a quick summary of how I wanted to do this since I was 8 years old and so far so good. He did ask if I was going to have SRS (so he knows something about it) and I told him that I was not sure yet. But his question made me wonder about his app and if there was more to it. But later, we talked about my new favorite subject, technological singularity and he brought up the app on his phone and how its impacting his profession.

As a side note, I may do a post on  technological singularity and how it's changing society. Donald Trump is a reflection of this change, yet not many people are talking about it. If we do not deal with this issue, it could rip this county apart.

I joke with my kids about it by telling then "Please do not to let a robot change my pamper, when I am 80 years old.". They laugh but I am serious and they know it. When they were young (late 80's early 90's), I use to talk to my car and elevators. They would laugh, but I was getting them ready for voice recognition and intelligent devices (now called the Internet of Things).

I ended up having a very busy day as it was my granddaughter's 8th birthday. I brought both of my grandchildren home with me.

I noticed all day, that I am looking more feminine. My male clothes feel different by the way they lay on my body and my look in these clothes is different. Its hard to point out examples. One example is my breast area. A second is the hip area. My pants are tighter around my hips. Also, my face is changing as it is losing that angular look and looks rounder and softer.

Finally, I went to Sam's and used my Groupon coupon to purchase a Sam's plus card at a 60% discount. Then I transferred my prescription from Walmart to Sams.

It was a very busy day from 5 am to 11 pm. The days of doing that as a boy is numbered.

Saturday, October 22, 2016

Saturday October 22, 2016 - Playing with dolls in the closet.

This is a repost from March 2015. Its over 18 months ago. This post is not about playing with dolls, but is about being the the closet and learning how to satisfy your dysphoria.

Many of us are still in the closet and suffer because we can not get out and express our femininity. However there are some practical things you can start today that will not only express your female self but get you ready for the time when you can go public.

For many years (decades), I was well hidden. But I developed, over time a way to express my inner girl and it became part of my everyday life. Doing these things made me feel that I was slowly moving forward.

I started shaving my legs in the 1980's. At first, I use to shave twice a week. Now I shave once every two weeks. In the 1990's I started shaving my face and in 2000's I included shaving everything else. So start shaving. Over time increase the area you shave. No one  ever asked why I have shaved legs. It became normal.

Body Cleaning Routine
I started taking showers, twice a day by added an evening shower before I go to bed. After each shower, I developed a routine to further clean and lotion by body. It make you feel nice, soft and smell good.
See my detailed post about this routine.

You can begin to slowly pluck your eyebrows. If asked, just say you are keeping them under control. You do not need to add an arch, just keep the longer lashed cut down and cleanup the bottom lash line, keeping the line straight across. I went to an electrologists in the 1990's and had the bottom and top lash lines straightened. I then had an arch added by having her permanently clean the bottom lash line with an upward swing. No one said anything over the year it took to do it. My youngest daughter use to say in high school that she wished she had eyebrows like mine.

I learned to take care of my finger and toe nails. I keep them cut. I buff my nails to take out the ridges and clean under my nails. I have had women state that my nails look clean and nice. Now I add clear polish. My father use to use clear nail polish because as a doctor, it made his hands appear cleaner. He use to get a manicure to keep his hands very clean. Who wants a doctor with ragged and dirty nails?

Now I do my own manicure but pay for a pedicure. I had a young man ask me if I got manicures. I said no and then he asked me how I kept my finger nails to nice. We talked about 10 minutes about my routine.
Click here for a detailed post on this routine.

Scalp Hair
I do not add anything for my scalp hair because I lost that back in the 1980's. I have a severe case of male pattern baldness. I knew that would happen early because of my maternal grandmother's brothers were bald. They all had male pattern baldness and it began early. Signs began with my front hair line while I was in high school. My crown started losing hair in college.

So I must wear a wig and therefore, I do not have a routine for hair except to shave off what little hair I have.

Over time you can add any of these items to your everyday activity. It's fun learning how to do them and then adding them slowly to your daily or weekly routine. Its adds to my feeling of femininity when I do these things and I lean more about what women go through everyday.

Friday, October 21, 2016

Friday October 21, 2016 - 17 yr old Transgender teenager on Dr, Phil. So Sad but there is hope.

Dr. Phil had a 17 year old transgender teen who does not get support from home. I do not know how she does it. Below is a short summary of the show which aired recently.

"My Transgender Son is Ruining His Life!" | Dr. Phil

Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Wednesday October 19, 2016 - Making your eyes stand out.

One of the major differences I notice between men and woman are the eyes. Transwoman on HRT, seem to reach a point when their eyes just pop.

But makeup also helps. Below is a picture of me with false eyelashes and basic makeup. I can not wait until I reach the point in my HRT, where my eyes seem to clear and stand out. Sorry this picture was taken with my older phone with the poor camera.

Below are two nice graphics that show how to apply lashes and eye shadow.

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Tuesday October 18, 2016 - Problems with my prescription

Since I started in June 2016, I have used my local Walmart to buy my HRT medication. I only get a four month (3 refill) prescription because I am suppose to see the Doctor every 3 months. I am OK with that.

Well the first three months (June, July & Aug) went well. I had my Dr's appointment and my pharmacy was sent a new prescription. In Sept, I was in Mississippi and needed a refill. There was a Walmart with a pharmacy just 2 miles from the hotel. So I called them and they helped me transfer my prescription to this MS store. They filled my prescription and everything was fine.

When I got back to Atlanta and filled my two week tray, I noticed I was short 13 tablets of Spironolactone. So I called my local pharmacy and had them pull back my prescription from MS. They sold me the additional 13 tablets. I should have gotten the 13 pills at no cost, but I could not prove that the MS store shorted me

In the beginning of Oct, I bought my monthly prescription. I noticed the bill was low but did not realize that instead of 60 tablets of Spironolatone, they sold me only 13 tablets. So I called them and they realized I was 47 tablets short. When I went to pick them up, they only could sell me 34 because I had already bought 13 when I came back from MS and 13 in the beginning of Oct.  My prescription was only 60 per month. So 60-13-13 = 34. WTF!

Then they told me I had no more refills. I was upset, but unlike my pre-HRT days, I did not cause a scene. I guess I am changing. I remained calm and left.

From my car, I called my Dr's office and they told me they would check on it. The office called me back a few hours later and said WalMart had made a mistake because they were referring to the old prescription and not the new September prescription. So I can buy the extra 13 pills and I have two more refills (Nov & Dec).

Maybe acting like a lady does have its perks.

I have a Dr's appointment at the end of November. So I will get a new prescription for December. Hopefully, it will be under a six month cycle, if my November blood work is good.

I am moving my prescription to Sams Club. It might not be any better, but it will be less expensive.

Monday, October 17, 2016

Monday October 17, 2016 - My weekend out in the Year 2000

My friend Max/Maxine had her 30th birthday in March 2000. She asked me to celebrate it with her by going to Orlando for the weekend. My parents lived in Orlando, so it was a good idea to hang out with my friend and visit my parents.

Max/Maxine was a gay male who loved to dress as Maxine. I would say in today's terms, I would label her a feminine male. I will use female pronouns for the rest of this story.

I met her at a nightclub one of my former students opened. He invited my to the opening, since I was his Entrepreneurship Professor and we always stayed in contact. I was proud at his success. That night, I met one of his friends, Maxine. I loved the way she presented herself. So we exchanged phone numbers because I wanted to hire her to help me with Susan's presentation. This was in the 1990's.

We became good friends because she helped me and kept my secret, while I hired her to work in my expanding computer training business. I ended up helping her open her own business as a computer trainer for senior citizens. During the time she worked for me, I learned how anti-LGBT some of my consultants were. I would correct them and say its about money and I will work with any competent person who can do the job. Once they got to know her, they agreed with me.

She passed away, at her father's house in 2014 under mysterious circumstances. I think it was health, due to her diabetes and lack of following a good diet. She took insulin, but eat anything. I did not know she had died until I noticed that I had not heard from her and when I tried to contact her, her phone was off. I google her name and found a TV story about her death.

During our friendship we went on several overnight road trips. This trip is the only one in which I have pictures. Sometime I forget that back in the "old days" taking pictures was a more predetermined activity. You did not keep a 35MM or 110 camera in your pocket.

We drove to Orlando Friday night and stayed in a hotel along International Drive, near the convention center. On Saturday, I visited my parents, while Maxine hung out shopping and setting up her birthday party at the local club. Later, I joined her for dinner. The picture above was my dinner outfit. I loved that dress. I still have those black heels and loved wearing stockings. I miss stocking days. I wear tights during the winter, to try and make up for it.

Later that night, I changed into a more causal outfit and we went to a nightclub to celebrate her birthday. That night she pickup a guy for a birthday present. Lol. I teased her about that all the way back to Atlanta.

With her passing before my Femboy and blogging days, I often think about how much fun it would have been if I had my "wing" mate during this phase of my transition.

Sunday, October 16, 2016

Sunday October 16, 2016 - Did go to gym today. Yeah!

It was tough but I did get up and go to the gym. I really need to for health reasons and to stay in some kind of shape. With my muscle mass down, my metabolism is also down. I should be eating less to compensate for my lower metabloism, but I am actually eating more.

Once I got to the gym, I watched an hour of football while I was on the elliptical machine. I did notice that my calorie burn rate was 107 calories per hour. Before HRT, I was burning 120 calories per hour and when I was really into losing weight, 5 years ago, my burn rate was 150.

With basketball starting soon and football, I am going to try and workout 3/4 days a week. It did not work last month. But I must do something, with Thanksgiving and Christmas around the corner.

Anyway, back to the gym. I wore my regular outfit, but its impossible to hide my breasts. So I just went with my sports bar and two t-shirts and said so what. Of course, I did not have any problems in the locker room or gym floor. I honestly believe, if I do not make an issue of it, no one else while either.

Sunday October 16, 2016 - Nice Top

I love being able to add a splash of color to my outfits.

I take my Granddaughter to her Saturday little league baseball game. My son-in-law coaches my grandson's team and my daughter has a part-time counseling job on Saturday. So I am going and loving the grandparent job.

While at the park, I noticed this parent with a nice yellow mesh top over a tank top. I like how she matches the yellow on her leggings to the top. Also the hood part is cute. I would not place it on my head but I like how it adds character to the top and overall outfit. I could see adding some jewelry with yellow in it.

I have two mesh tops like her yellow one. But no hoodie top on mine. However, I bought these to use in the gym. I am going to add them to my every day casual outfits.

Yesterday I was out driving all over town and in meetings all day, after the little league game. So, today I am going to spend some femtime on me. I need to do some housing cleaning and I am going to clean my makeup sponges and brushes.

I have noticed that my body hair is not growing that much. There is some on my arms and genital areas. But my torso and legs have very little growth. But today,  I am going to take a nice relaxing bath this afternoon, after I got to the gym.

Yes, I am going to the gym today while I watch the first half of the football game. Wish me luck that I do not back out of the gym.

Saturday, October 15, 2016

Saturday October 15, 2016 - Bits and pieces

I have been in contact via Facebook with a college student a met at the local mall. I gave him a ride back to campus and I talked about my journey and I that I was from the same college, 40 years ago. We exchanged Facebook information. I gave him the doctor's office I was using for HRT. He messaged me yesterday saying that he started HRT this month. He is using the same doctor. I am so happy for him and I am glad I was able to help. He told me that meeting an "older" alumni and hearing my story helped him. We are going to have lunch soon and I can not wait for use to compare notes.

Overall, I am very happy with my transition. The physical and mental changes are positive. Everyday I look in the mirror, I see Susan and look more female. I mentioned awhile ago that when I was young I use to pray every night for breasts and to be a girl. Then when I stated getting gynecomastia, I got scared and stopped. Now my dreams have come true and I am so happy. It will not be much longer that I will become full-time. This will be my last step in my plan which would have taken 7 years. Notice SRS is not on the list. I fiigured, I will decide that at some future date.

Mentally, I am happy that the male sex drive is almost gone. I have a calmness that I really enjoy. Plus I just feel more connected with woman issues. Its hard to describe but I get it now.

My Plan:

  1. Lose weight
  2. Electrology
  3. Skin mangement
  4. Gain confidence in public (femboy)
  5. HRT
  6. Full-Time

The only thing holding me back are finances. But I am working hard, yet slower, on a solution and some new opportunities.

Also, as I stated earlier, I need to get back in the gym to keep my diabetes in check. I am borderline and diet and exercise keep me under that line. So its more than just looks, its about health.

Friday, October 14, 2016

Friday October 14, 2016 - Just reduced my monthly HRT medicine bill another 30%

In June 2016, when I bought my first HRT prescription, I paid $70.00for a monthly supply. I thought $70 was not too bad. Its the cost of 1 hour with my electrologist.

My monthly prescription is:
$53.00 - 60 tabs of 100mg Spironolactone (2/day)
$ 9.00  - 60 tabs of    2mg Estradiol (2/day)
$ 8.00 -  30 tabs of    5mg Finasteride
$70.00  TOTAL

Then, in August, I found GoodRx. It's web site that helps you significantly reduce your prescription cost. I signed up for free and put in my prescription. It found that my local Walmart took the GoodRx coupon. My monthly cost dropped to $41.00. This is a $29.00 savings or a 41% reduction. The reduction was based on an GoodRX coupon that reduced the Spironolactone from $53.00 to $24.00

Well, yesterday I found an additional saving that reduced my monthly prescription down to $28.00. Its a $13.00 savings or an additional 12.3% reduction.

My monthly prescription is:
$20.00 - 60 tabs of 100mg Spironolactone (2/day)
$ 4.00  - 60 tabs of    2mg Estradiol (2/day)
$ 4.00 -  30 tabs of    5mg Finasteride
$28.00  TOTAL

How did I do this. I read an article about Sams pharmacy offering Finasteride at no cost for Sams Club Plus members. So I went buy the pharmacy to ask them about this. They told me that the State of Georgia does not allow them the sell Finastride at no cost. I gave them my prescription and the total monthly cost was $28.00. I saved $156.00 per year ($13.00*12 months).

However the Sams Club Plus card cost $100.00 per year. The $156.00 saving more that offset the cost of the card. Then I found a Groupons coupon that allows me to buy an annual Plus card for only $45.00 plus they will give me a $5.00 Sams gift card and rotisserie chicken.

So in 5 months, I was able to reduce my monthly medicine cost from $70.00 to $28.00. This is $42.00 savings or a 60.00% savings. Its only cost me less than $40.00 for the Sams Plus card and now I have access to the lower priced gas and food.

Thursday, October 13, 2016

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Wednesday October 12, 2016 - Another Boy Fail

Sunday, before I went out, I decided that i was going to wear one of my 36B bras. I have a very pretty lace bra and I wanted to wear it. When I tried it on, I did not quite fill the cups. But I am getting closer. You can see me in it below.

I love the look of this bra, but you can see from the right side picture that there is still some empty space at the top. I do not quite push out the lace along each cup's top.

Even if the pace of my breast growth slows, which I expect, I will probably will fill out this bra and the other 36B bras by the end of the year (2.5 months).

I then tried on a variety of shirts, including one of my new shirts, to see how I look with this bra on. With each of the shirts below, I could not hide my breasts. I was failing in male mode. This is going to be an issue because I had not expected to go full-time until later in 2017. However, the changes I am experiencing may cause me to go full-time sooner. Or I will need to find away to hide my breasts. I may need a binder which I do not want to wear.

If you look at these five pictures, you will see that my breasts line is obvious. Growing up with gyncomastia, I learned how the hide small breasts.

If I go back to wearing a sports bra, that will help, but it it's not what I like to wear anymore. I thought I had a year of HRT before going full time. I no longer think I have that much time. I could see this as a big problem by January 2017. I might be able to hide my chest during the winter (Jan, Feb and part of March), but by spring 2017. I may have to go full-time.

I am in month 5 and I am having some issues I did not expect. I must try to get control of these issues, But I believe that the mental control I use to have is slipping away.

My main concerns are:
  1. Concealing my breasts
  2. Eating Control
  3. Getting back in Gym

This HRT stuff is harder than I thought. But I would not give up the 5.5 years of planning or the 4 months of results.

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Tuesday October 11, 2016 - Sunday out with Karen

Sunday afternoon Karen and I got together to see a movie. BTW, we saw The Girl On The Train. It was a very good mystery. You should go see it, especially if you think you are good at picking the killer early in the movie.

Also the interaction among the female characters was very interesting. I am starting to get (feel) those relationships.

Anyway, Karen was out of town for two weeks in order to visit her son and celebrate her birthday. After the movie, we went shopping at Target looking for jewelry cases.

I really in join this relationship, because it gives my that woman-to-woman relationship that allows me to ask questions and get direct opinions, comments and recommendations from another woman. We have hung out while I was in both boy and Susan mode.

After not see each other for two weeks, Karen stated that she noticed a slight change in my face. Also my new clothes were nice and the new shirts hid any breast development.

While at Target, we walked around just talking about random things. We also talked about clothes, shoes, household decorations and jewerly we liked. Her taste is more eclectic too me. I am more conservative.

For example she likes:

I like:

I find the difference in taste fun as we discuss why we like certain things. I notice part of her taste is based on her experiences of living in California, but also her decades as a woman.

I am still learning what works for me and I stay conservative. Maybe after a few more years and going full-time, I will have the confidence to experiment more.

Monday, October 10, 2016

Monday October 10, 2016 - Braiding Hair

I wear a wig. My hair comes down below my shoulder. During this past summer, it got very hot under there and along the back of my neck. I tried various ways of putting my hair up and off my shoulders and neck.

I found this infographic about hair braiding. I am going to try it.

Sunday, October 9, 2016

Sunday October 9, 2016 - 4th Month Measurements

Below are my current measurements and the change since last month. The picture is followed an explanation and then a table showing the monthly changes since I began HRT.

The above chart shows that last month 5 of 7 measurements increased. My shoulders remained the same and my thighs went down. The largest increase was my breast line at 1.75".

I tried to workout more. My goal was 3 times a week for 4 weeks. However, I only exercised twice a week every other week. The workouts were not bad. It was getting motivated to get to the gym. Once I got there, I was OK.

The difference in size between my above breast area and breast line size increased from 2.5 inches to 3.25 inches. I started at a 1" difference and it continues to grow.

The difference between the area under my breast line (bra band) and my breast line increased (after shrinking slightly last month): from 3.75 inches to 4.75. This is the largest difference to date. I started at 2 inches and went to 4 inches (2 months in a row), then down to 3.75" and now up to 4.75".

My waist at my belly button did increase slightly by 0.50" inch. I am staying in that 37" range. I would love to figure out how I can reduce it. I know diet and cardo helps. Diet impacts it more than exercise. Maybe Calisthenics will help. I feel hopeless about my stomach. But I am going to find a solution.

My hip measurement finally increased. I have been feeling a roundness for months. I think my hips were slowly filling in and now are moving outward. Its not the bone structure, its the fat around the bone.

My thighs had a second month of reduction slightly by 0.50".

Overall I am happy about my breasts. I would like my overall size to reduce from in the upper 30 inches to middle 30 inch range (except breast line, shoulders and hips).

I need to figure out how to get back into the gym and get my stomach down.

Also, I hope the measurement difference between my shoulders and hips will continue to shrink.

45.0 43.0 43.0
ABOVE BREAST 37.0 37.0 37.5 36.0 36.5
BUST LINE 38.0 39.0 39.5 38.50 39.75
BRA BAND 36.0 35.0 35.5 34.75 35.0
WAIST@BELLY BUTTON 38.0 36.0 37.0 36.5 37.0
HIPS 40.0 40.0 40.0 40.0 41.0
THIGHS 37.0 37.0 37.0 36.5 36.0
HIPS VS SHOULDERS -- 5.0 5.0 3.0 2.0

My physical goals for month 5 are:

  1. a lower waist measurement
  2. increase Breast line measurement
  3. increased hips measurement

My mental goal is to continue to enjoy myself and be happy. I want to embrace my femininity and rejoice in its strength.

Saturday, October 8, 2016

Saturday October 8, 2016 - My first week living as Susan May 1994

In a previous post, I discussed my coming out in Sept 1993, as Susan through Tri-Ess. By the winter of 1994, I realized that Tri-Ess was not for me. It did not satisfy my dysphoria. As a matter of fact, it made me want more. I did not want to be a woman, once a month. I wanted to be one full-time.

However, this was a very busy time for me and transitioninng was out of the question. I was teaching full-time, with the Olympics coming, my appraisal business was running full-tilt and I was President of a growing and very success Little League program (50 baseball teams, on ESPN, CNN, ABC and NBC).

So I decided, I was going to use my May Hilton Head timeshare to live as a woman full-time for one week. I wanted to try and see if I go on vacation with only female clothes.

Starting in April, I starting buying shoes and outfits for seven days. I decided to even leave the house as Susan, drive 4 hours to Hilton Head and spend from Saturday afternoon until the next Saturday morning as Susan.

Even back in 1994, I kept my legs shaved. But on Friday night I did a body shave. On Saturday morning I shaved my face, dressed and added makeup. On the way out, I stopped and had acrylic nails added. It was the first time I had my nails done. I was nervous but it was fun to have nice long red nails (1990's).

After finishing my nails, I drove 4.5 hours to Hilton Head. I was early, as I could not check into my unit until after 5 pm. This allows the cleaning of the individual units.

I drove to the Island museum and toured it. I had a lady in the parking lot, take this picture.

After the museum tour, I checked into the Island Club. Again, I had a security guard, take this picture.I soon realized that heels were not worn at a beach resort. So I had all of these heel and ended up wearing my white sneakers and one pair of flats, the rest of the time.

I do not remember what I did everyday during the week. I know, I went grocery shopping on Saturday. I went shopping and bought some new foundation. The Mary Kay foundation was OK, but I ended up buying some new Fashion Fair foundation. I spent a few days practicing my makeup.

I did go canoeing one day. I liked this outfit. The white shorts and top were cute for the time.

The main problem I remember was how my foundation began to come off after sweating while canoeing. I did not realize that until I got back to the condo.

This was the first time I realized the difference between dressing as a male and being a female. I needed to check my makeup after I finished and before I paid the clerk. Also makeup and a workout do not go together.

This is another one of my outfits. I had the security guard take this picture.

Finally, I did go out one night to a club in Savannah. I did not get any pictures but it was nice to get dressed up and go out.

After the week was over, I wanted more. I had a great time and did this again in 1996, just 2 months before the Atlanta Olympics.