Tuesday March 31, 2015 - The reaction to Indiana's RFRA Law is proof that public opinion is changing.

The reaction to the Indiana's Religious Freedom Restoration Act provides more proof that public opinion toward LGBT issues has changed.

I have been saying, in this blog, that my actual dealing with the public as an out and proud feminine male that public opinion has changed. This is just additional proof.

I do not need a poll to prove it. If you do, here is one.


OVERVIEW
The new Indiana law allows businesses and individuals in which the government is not a party to the lawsuit, to use religious freed in court as a defense against a discrimination lawsuit. This is different from the law passed by President Clinton and 19 states. In the federal and state laws, it prohibits businesses and individuals from using religious freedom as a defense in lawsuits where a government entity is not party to the suit.

Despite what Governor Pence says, this law not only allows discrimination against the LGBT community, but any minority group, as long as the defendant can prove his/her religious beliefs are against that person, group or issue.

For me, it not only against me as a T-person but there are still "religious-based" beliefs against worshipers of Jewish and Muslim faiths, African -Americans,  interracial marriages and living together and not married. This law provides a legal loophole in which discrimination against these group can now become legal.

Here is a link to a article that discuses Biblical passages used to condemn interracial marriages.

Here is a link to an article that discuses how religious liberty was used to support Jim Crow laws.

Here is a link to an article that discusses Biblical passages in support of antisemitism.

Some will argue that Indiana's Civil Rights Law will protect people from discrimination based on religion, race, sex and color. But this new law provides a possible loophole that will have to be tested in court.

THE GOOD NEWS
Condemnation against this discrimination law has been swift from all reasonable corners of society. Democrats, Republicans, LGBT community, non-LGBT "straight" community, Business community and parts of the religious community.

In the business community, I have noticed all of the tech, internet and web-based companies coming out against this law and putting their money to work against it. These are the growing companies that are creating the jobs of the future. It tells me that a LGBT person does have some safe environments in which to work and grow. As this segment of the economy will continue to lead economic growth and job creation, a young LGBT person would do well to study and earn degrees required for employment within these firms.

But it does not stop there, other cities and states have joined to condemn this law.

And maybe best of all, it stopped such bills in Georgia and North Carolina. In both cases, the linked articles state that the bills were stalled after the Indiana uproar.

SUMMARY
I am upset about this Indiana law but heartened by the broad outrage against it. Today is a Femboy day for me and I am going to walk a little taller and prouder as I believe we are being accepted into the general community.

So to everyone reading this blog, I say put on your prettiest heels and walk tall, proud and confident knowing that you can present as who you really are, knowing that most people will support your right to do so.

Monday March 30, 2015 - Susan's Wedding

Have you ever thought about your wedding as the bride?

I always wanted a beach wedding. Being in Hilton Head brought back memories of  my future wedding. I love the beach, the sound of the surf, the smell and overall scenery.

If it were in Hilton Head, it would be at the Island Club resort and in either June or September. The weather and water are warm and there is usually not that much rain.

Below is my Wedding Pinterest Board

Follow Susan King's board Wedding on Pinterest.

Sunday March 29, 2015 - OMG, I ate too much

I had a good time in Hilton Head, but I ate too much. Each meal was a buffet and I lost control. On the bus trip from Atlanta to Hilton Head (Thursday afternoon), we stopped at Ryan's Buffet.

I did alright at Ryan's because I paced myself. I started with a large salad and used salsa as a salad dressing (low calorie substitute). Then I had a large vegetable plate. I drank two glasses of water to help fill me up. Then I got a small meat plate with baked chicken and fish. Luckily, their dessert bar was not very good, so I had a small piece of sugar free apple pie with a little ice cream.

I felt pretty good. But dinner, OMG. They had a buffet and I did the salad plate, followed by the veggy plate and water. Then, I eat a small piece of beef and their baked chicken was dry, so I did not each much. BUT, they had a three layer chocolate cake and I lost my mind. I had one piece and it was so good. So I had a second piece. I tried to offset it by going to the hotel gym and using the stationary bike for 60 minutes. The bike was a not a good quality bike, so my knees started hurting after 45 minutes. But I made one hour.

The exercise, might have helped a little, but that cake spiked my sugar levels.

Saturday, after my presentation, I drove my rental car to Coligny Mall. It is a nice outside festival style center with local shops. It has the type of tourist style shops you expect at a beach resort. Many people go off the Island to Tanger Outlet, but you can find most of those stores at your local shopping area.

Well, the first thing I did was go to the fudge shop and buy two double stuffed and chocolate dipped Oreo cookies. I love those things. Then I had to go to the ice cream shop and buy a cup of bubble gum ice cream. Now my blood sugar levels are all over the place and I am losing portion control.  I bought junk food and nibbled on stuff all afternoon while I shopped.

I wish I was in Femboy mode because I was shopping for female jewelry and clothes. I would have tried on some items, but it would have been hard to judge the clothes without being in the correct mode. I could not see how it fit my overall appearance. So I just window shopped.

I saw some nice items and  I did buy two pendants for my necklaces. I spent three hours shopping and really enjoyed it.

I felt like Susan wearing men's clothes. So I guess I was girl crossdressing as a guy. I pass pretty good. ;-}No strange looks, lol.


I got back to the hotel in time for the dinner buffet. I eat too much macaroni and cheese and I had a big piece of cheese cake. I do not even like cheese cake! But my body was probably at a low blood sugar level and I need to raise it. I asked for chocolate cake, but they were out of it. Thank God!  So I did the cheese cake and said to myself, I would exercise later that night. Well, I ended up socializing and did not exercise.

Saturday morning, I lost control at the breakfast buffet. I am glad I did not eat the waffles. I had a veggy omelet but had coffee with sugar and a lot of bacon and sausage.

We left the hotel two hours late because the bus had a battery problem. Then, when we finally got on the road, the bus cut off because of a water problem. After another hour, we finally got on the road. Finally, within 1 hour outside of Atlanta, we ran into construction and a 90 minute traffic jam, We were suppose to be back in Atlanta by 6 pm but did not get in until 10:30 pm.


While waiting for the bus and all during the trip back, I was having sugar craving which caused me to eat junk food and even drink a diet soda (No No) on the way back.

We did stop for dinner and I got a large meatball salad from subway. Then I had two bananas. This calmed my food cravings.

I have got to get my blood sugar back to its normal level. So I will exercise today, Monday and Tuesday for at least 90 minutes each day. I will also closely watch my sugar and calorie intake.

But I did have a good time.

I always love these types of "adventures" with travel and food issues. It allows me the opportunity to try and solve the problems.

I have a monthly weigh-in Wednesday morning and I hope I did not blow my weight success I was having this month.

Saturday March 28, 2015 - Hilton Head, S.C.

I am spending a few days in Hilton Head, S.C. with my job. I love this place and I hope to retire here.

One of the reasons I love this place is that in both 1994 and 1996, I spend one week as Susan.

My 1994 trip was the first time I spent 7/24 as a women. It was an exciting time that I will always remember. I spent the week learning makeup and working on my wig. I went shopping but I was very nervous.

When I went again in 1996, I was on the internet and joined a message board for "crossdressers". On that trip, I was able to find others who lived on Hilton Head. I joined them for an outing and a meeting.

It showed that within two years, the technology had changed enough to allowed a me to reach out to a community of similar people. It turned a private personal event into a shared event within the community. I enjoyed the 1996 week much better and learned much more.

However, I ended up going back in the closet after this week because I knew that I had some responsibilities and could not transition. Plus the public was not ready yet. I had some positive experiences but I had most negative experiences. One negative experience was when I at the Savannah Mall, I was called out as a man in a dress by a couple of young people. I had gone to the same mall earlier in the week, to buy some shoes at Payless without a problem. I went back and was embarrassed. So I left and went back to Hilton Head.

Now almost 20 years later, I have not had any problems out. Of course, I am in Femboy mode not women mode.But not only has the public changed but I have too.

I have lost contact with that group I met, in 1996. I can not longer find that "crossdreessing" group.

So as I look out at the ocean and remember the past and I am anxiously looking forward to a lovely feminine future.

Friday March 27, 2015 - Exercise

Thursday, I worked out in one of my new Femboy outfits. I am wearing two T-shirts. The outer t-shirt has a low V-shape collar with nice print and lower helm line. The inner t-shirt is grey with a higher neckline and higher helm. The inner shirt matches my leggings. The two shirts give me a nice double color top and did a good job of absorbing the sweat from 60 minutes of cardio.

I am wearing a grey yoga pair of pants. I could not find one I liked with a top color band. But I will keep searching Goodwill until I find one. I added my black and dark pink sneakers. I changed the shoe string color to match the outer shirt.My ankle socks are dark pink to match the sneakers.

I am going to look for a second pair of sneaker to provide another alternative for my outfits.Once I buy the second pair of sneakers, I will buy additional ankle socks that match the variety of outfit colors.

I had no issues with my outfit as everyone was busy working out. I like these outfits and I look better in them than the old baggy t-shirt and baggy shorts to the knee.

Thursday March 26, 2015 - Femboy Shopping - Goodwill

Tuesday, I went shopping at Goodwill for some spring outfits and feminine workout clothes.

I only had about 90 minutes to shop because the State Farm adjuster was coming by. I talked about the adjusted in yesterday's post.

I needed about 4 or 5 hours, so I just looked for some spring pants and gym pants.

Next week, I will find a few more long T-shirts and another pair of sneakers.

Below is a slideshow of what I found and tried on. There is a caption with each picture stating what I like and do not like about each piece.

Put your mouse arrow on the slideshow to see the stop/start button at the left bottom.

Exercise Pants:


Spring/Summer Pants:

Wednesday March 25, 2015 - Yesterday was another Femboy Day

Yesterday, I enjoyed my day out. I am so at ease now, I am ready to transition to this look full time. I can not wait.

Well I had my electrology session in the morning. It hurt around the mouth and especially the mustache area. Luckily, I do not have much more hair in that area. But it still makes the tears flow.

After my session was complete, I went into the restroom to apply my makeup.

Usually, I do not eat until after the session because of time. Therefore, my stomach allways growls during my session. This time, I stopped at Smoothie King to get something to eat before the session. I like their Yogurt Delight smoothie with strawberries and I make it a skinny (limited sugar). I talked with the young lady making my smoothie and when the next customer came it, I said hello. The customer went to sit down and I told her that her hair was a nice and I liked the style. She smiled and said thank you.

I mentioned last week, that I am going to talk more when out. My voice is still male, but I am trying to learn how to make it less masculine. I am not trying to pass as a women. I am just a feminine man. I do not want a heavy male voice but just s softer voice with female tendencies. This will help me develop my female voice for when I need to pass.

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Two weeks ago, we had water damage in our house, due to an overflowing toilet on the second floor. The State Farm adjusted wanted to come Tuesday. So I set a 2 pm appointment, knowing I was in Femboy mode. You can see a picture of him, in his red State Farm shirt and his van.

I got home from Goodwill shopping at 1:54 pm and he was waiting for me. I went in the house and put my pocketbook and Goodwill bag down on the kitchen counter. Then I opened the door for him. I was in Femboy mode and he said hello. He did not flinch or appear surprised. I showed him the damage on the first and second floor.

We talked for over 20 minutes and I answered all of his questions. It was like being in boy mode. Now of course, as State Farm adjuster, he can not be rude to the customer and I am sure he has seen many things. But for me, this was a "step onto the ledge".

I set this meeting up because I wanted to try this and see what will happen. He was not uncomfortable and neither was I.

This was a test. Just like my visit with my brother's condominium, I need to mentally feel comfortable presenting this way. I think the public already is. As the media projects transpeople as regular hardworking and honest members of society,  society will accept us (or at least tolerate us) as members of the community.

We must learn to accept ourselves.

Tuesday March 24, 2015 - Odds and Ends Part 2

Today is electrology day. I will spend the day as a Femboy and will do a little shopping at Goodwill. I am looking to buy a few more yoga pants and woman T-shirts.

Once I find those pants (I have two pair and need at least two more pair) I will buy a second pair of sneakers.

Also, I am looking for some special pieces that I can add to my Femboy spring outfits. I do not know what they are, but I will know them when I find them. I love this part of shopping. That is hunting for unique items that make your outfit pop.

I will tell you all about it, over the next few days.

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My brother came over my house to talk. We spent three hours talking about transgender issues. Earlier in the month, I was at his house as a Femboy, but we mostly talked business. But this time he had alot of questions.

I welcomed his honesty and frankness. He does not have a problem with it. He just wanted to put it in the family timeline. He is 6 years younger than me. So he had mostly family questions like what did Mom and Dad think about it. Also, who else may have known.

I told my brother this one story I remember. I was at the house of my parent's best friends, playing with their children, who were my buddies. I was in my early teens and like kids in the 1960's, we were drawing stuff and talking. I draw out my last name which has an "i" in it. Instead of putting a dot over the "i", I drew a heart. I showed it to my mother and her friend, who we called "aunt". My aunt thought it was cute, but my mother got mad and told me not to do that anymore. After I left, I heard my aunt ask why my mother was mad. My mother lowered her voice and I knew she was telling my aunt about me dressing as a girl. Well, I never did that again, because I did not want others to know.

Overall it was a good talk and I told my brother that I will tell our sister, next time I am in Florida to visit our Mom.

Monday March 23, 2015 - Odds and Ends

Its been going on for over a month. Every once in awhile, I smell the body order or general smell of men around me. I use to never have this happen to me. Yesterday, I was at the mall waiting in line to buy a Subway sandwich. The young guy in front of me had a bad body order.

Now, sometimes I talk to people who may have bad breath. But I never remember smelling odors. I may walk by a guy and get whiff of it. Last weekend, I was in a crowded elevator and smelled a guy near me.

Now I know many women who have a keen sense of smell. I read once where a woman's sense of smell was a way of protecting the family from bad food.

My Dad told me when I was a teenager that if I wanted a girlfriend I needed to shower and wear cologne. Also, he taught me to carry mints to keep my breath fresh because women have a keen sense of smell.

I use to not smell anybody. My nose must have been off duty when it comes to smells.

But for some reason, my nose is on full alert and its searching guys.

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Saturday, I took some selfies. I tried on different outfits and took some pictures with my phone. I downloaded a nice Android app that helped me control the front facing camera. I am going to post a set of these pictures soon.

For me it was a big deal. Over the past decades, I hated looking at myself. I rarely looked at myself in the mirror. But now I like how I look and I like looking in the mirror to check to make sure everything is perfect.

So I am taking this time to study what looks good on me and experiment. It was fun and I took some good pictures. I am developing a post in which I will look at how certain clothes work well with my body and some that do not look good..

Sunday March 22, 2015 - Working on my finger nails

Yesterday, I discussed developing a feminine routine to keep your body feeling  and looking feminine. These four routines can be done even if you are still in the closet.

I was asked to discuss  Nail routine in more detail. I have an earlier post on my body cleaning routine.

My Nails
I like to keep my finger nails clean and well kept. I now get a pedicure every two weeks, so I no longer have a routine for my toe nails.

Below are my tools that I use for my finger nail routine. I go through this routine, at least once a week. I do this while watching TV.

Tools

I use this remover with a cotton ball	I like the pads with remover already on the pad
Main Nail Clipper	Side Nail Clipper
Plastic Cuticle Pusher	Wooden Cuticle Pusher
Six Sided File	Four Sided File
Hand Scub	Hand Lotion
Clear Nail Polish	Clear Nail Hardener

Routine

If I have on nail polish, I remove it with either a paid or a cotton ball with nail polish poured on it.

I keep clear polish on, so I remove it first. I hold the wipe or cotton ball on my polished nail for a few seconds before I wipe the polish off.

This gives the remover a chance to soak in before removing.

After I remove the polish, I soak my fingers in warm soap water for three to five minutes per hand.

I soak one hand and then work on it. Then I soak the other hand.

I use either the wooden or plastic cuticle to push back my cuticles. The cuticle area is the thin layer of skin over the nails at the base. The warm water softens them, which makes them easier to push back.

If I need to, I clip each nail to keep them the same length and shape. I will file the ends later to smooth them.

Use the file to file the top of each nail. Either the four or six sided file has different levels of coarseness. I use the higher coarse level first to smooth out ridges. Then move from most to least coarse side which will make my nail smooth and shiny.

When removing ridges, I do not remove too much nail. Just take your time to remove just enough to smooth out the ridges.

I move from  nail to nail until each finger looks like it has clear polish on it. Their will have a nice shine to them.

I f you do not want the shine, then do not use the last (least coarse) file.

File the edges of each nail to get the exact shape on each nail. I file in the same direction across each nail. This will reduce spliting and cracking of the nail. Also tilt your file downward to include a slight area under the nail.

 I use the four/six sided file. I use one of the middle coarse sides.

I like this part because I remember my sister and mother doing this when I was growing up. I wanted to join them.

So I get to watch my favorite TV show while filing my nails.

I wash my hands and then put some sea salt scrub on my hands. I rub them together which exfoliates and cleans.

After I wash this scrub off, they feel so smooth. If you have not tried this, you will find the results amazing.

Once the scrub was been completely washed off, I lotion my hands.

My hands will feel so feminine and look great after the lotion has been rubbed in.

Finally, I add two coats of clear polish. At Sally Beauty Supply Store, I did find a non-shiny clear polish. It does work, but it does not last long. I used it as a second coat and it started to peel off after a few days.

So, I use two coats of shiny clear polish or one coat of polish and one coat of hardening polish.

Of course, this is optional, if you do not want that polished look. I have no problem with being polished. Even at my job, its not an issue.







This routine takes awhile to get use to and some time to complete. I try to complete this weekly and even if you are still in the closet, most people will say nothing.

I find that most ladies will admire the look. I find most women like "guys" with clean and nicely manicured hands.

Saturday March 21, 2015 - Still in the closet? Try this

Many of us are still in the closet and suffer because we can not get out and express our femininity. However there are some practical things you can start today that will not only express your female self but get you ready for the time when you can go public.

For many years (decades), I was well hidden. But I developed, over time a way to express my inner girl and it became part of my everyday life. Doing these things made me feel that I was slowly moving forward.

Shaving
I started shaving my legs in the 1980's. At first, I use to shave twice a week. Now I shave once every two weeks. In the 1990's I started shaving my face and in 2000's I included shaving everything else. So start shaving. Over time increase the area you shave. No one  ever asked why I have shaved legs. It became normal.



Body Cleaning Routine
I started taking showers, twice a day by added an evening shower before I go to bed. After each shower, I developed a routine to further clean and lotion by body. It make you feel nice, soft and smell good.
See my detailed post about this routine.

Eyebrows
You can begin to slowly pluck your eyebrows. If asked, just say you are keeping them under control. You do not need to add an arch, just keep the longer lashed cut down and cleanup the bottom lash line, keeping the line straight across. I went to an electrologists in the 1990's and had the bottom and top lash lines straightened. I then had an arch added by having her permanently clean the bottom lash line with an upward swing. No one said anything over the year it took to do it. My youngest daughter use to say in high school that she wished she had eyebrows like mine.

Nails
I learned to take care of my finger and toe nails. I keep them cut. I buff my nails to take out the ridges and clean under my nails. I have had women state that my nails look clean and nice. Now I add clear polish. My father use to use clear nail polish because as a doctor, it made his hands appear cleaner. He use to get a manicure to keep his hands very clean. Who wants a doctor with ragged and dirty nails?

Now I do my own manicure but pay for a pedicure. I had a young man ask me if I got manicures. I said no and then he asked me how I kept my finger nails to nice. We talked about 10 minutes about my routine.
Click here for a detailed post on this routine.

Scalp Hair
I do not add anything for my scalp hair because I lost that back in the 1980's. I have a severe case of male pattern baldness. I knew that would happen early because of my maternal grandmother's brothers were bald. They all had male pattern baldness and it began early. Signs began with my front hair line while I was in high school. My crown started losing hair in college.

So I must wear a wig and therefore, I do not have a routine for hair except to shave off what little hair I have.



SUMMARY
Over time you can add any of these items to your everyday activity. It's fun learning how to do them and then adding them slowly to your daily or weekly routine. Its adds to my feeling of femininity when I do these things and I lean more about what women go through everyday.

Friday March 20, 2015 - Spent Thursday in Femboy mode

It was cold and raining in Atlanta yesterday. Its that strange weather of hot one day and cold the next as spring fights its way in.

I was inside most of the day but dressed in my feminine attire.

I did go out to Office Depot to copy some papers and buy some storage boxes, light bulbs  and a thumb drive. Afterwards, I went to Quicktrip to buy a slice of pizza and refill my QT cup with ice water.

As usual I had no issues in either place. In Office Depot, I asked employee where the light bulbs were and talked to the guy at the computer section. In both cases, they called me sir, which was OK. At the check out, the young guy did not know what to call me, so he did not use a pronoun.

I found what I needed and interacted with various employees. The interaction is new as I feel more comfortable being me.

Next week, I am going to start interacting with other female customers as another female by asking their opinion and giving them compliments.

At Quicktrip, a guy opened the door for me and I whispered Thank You. Once in the store, I grabbed a slice of pizza and filled my Quicktrip. I paid and left.

I use that QT all the time and they have seen me in both boy and femboy mode.

As I stated earlier, I am getting comfortable with my feminine attire.

Thursday March 19, 2015 - Shoes I recently tried on.

Over the last few weeks, while in Femboy mode, I have been buying flats and sneakers. I am always on the lookout for flats I can wear in my Femboy mode.

Also, I have been trying on heel and boots. But I have not bought any because I already has a few cute pair and I do not wear them enough. Two weeks ago,  I wore a pair of open toe wedges, but that was unusual to wear such feminine shoes. I love heels when I am going out as a women but not as a feminine male.

I have a slide show of some of my recent shoes. Which ones, do you like?

Wednesday March 18, 2015 - Tuesday was another Femboy day.

Last week, I spent three days out in my Femboy mode. I could not wait to get back out yesterday. I had my weekly electrology session.

It was over 70 degrees Tuesday. Most of my outfits are for cold weather. So today, after my session, I went out looking for spring and summer clothes. I have not gone out in my Femboy mode during warm or hot weather.

I do not need a coat, sweater, jacket or hoodie. My leggings are OK for now. But I am going to have to figure out some shorts or knee length pants.

I have a few short sleeve female shirts and a few spaghetti tops. But I need to figure out a basic look for spring and summer. Just like I have a basic look for fall and winter.  Then build on that basic look.

I went out to Goodwill looking for a warm weather outfit.

Below are a few pictures of my outfit yesterday. I wore a female shirt with a white spaghetti strap top. I kept the shirt open, so the white top showed across my chest along with a green pendant for St Patrick's day. I had on dark brown leggings, knee hi stockings and a caramel colored flat shoe. The picture below on the right has me in those cute light brown open toe heels from Payless.

Here was my outfit for Tuesday

Here I am at Payless Shoes with those cute brown open toe heels I liked

 I found these jeans at Goodwill. I love the color and fit. I think they will work as part of my warm weather outfit.












Here is an example of my warm weather outfit. I have a nice thin T-shirt with short sleeves. Under that T-shirt is a solid color t-shirt without sleeves. I can create a multi-layer look. The outside shirt will have a print and nice color. It will end at or below my hips.

Then I can wear jeans, like those I found at Goodwill yesterday. Or I can buy some shorts that are above the knee or leggings at or below the knee.

I did not find any shorts or leggings to try on Tuesday. But I bought 5 T-shirts and those rose jeans.

I need to brighten up my shoes, with a white and other bright colored flats. I have an open toe orange pair.

Its going to be fun finding these outfits.

I am still looking for new workout outfits. So I will be busy shopping the next few weeks. I can not wait.